Inside the anxiety over having too many dolls

Hi there! I don't know how much help I'm going to be. I'm pushing the big 5-0, and I find that the older I get, the less I care about what others think.

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? Don't really have a number limit, but I am trying to limit smaller than 60 cm. It's more of a feeling. If I start to feel like I have too many, then I start looking to cull

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? It looks cleaner when there are fewer dolls in the house. But then I miss them. So it's a constant battle between clean, bare space, and look at that bare space. I bet I could put a doll there.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? I was clean-up duty as a kid in my house. I lived with people who never threw anything away. They would leave trash on the kitchen counters, dirty laundry on the floor - and I would get yelled at for not cleaning it up. Socks in the living room fill me with primal rage.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? I don't like when dolls are hidden behind other dolls - that is a thing.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? my playline dolls bother me as much as my BJDs in this respect. Everything is packaged in single-size, non-reusable plastic. I love getting a new dolly in the mail. Man, do I hate throwing away the packaging. There's only so much room to store/re-use.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? Correlates to work. Bad times at work - need to sell dolls or buy a doll to make myself feel better. Good times at work - happy with my dolls, excited to craft.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? Oh, yes. All of my non-doll-collecting friends/family are freaked out by my dolls - the number of them, and their size. They all want me to sell them all for a big mark-up.
They are not allowed to come to my house anymore. Life's too short for that sort of negativity. I can afford them. They make me happy. You don't like them? Tough.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? With BJDs, one of the biggest downsides is that you never get to see the doll in person before buying. I'll fall in love with a face-up or something else in a promo photo, but once the doll is in my hands, there's something I just do not like about it. It doesn't happen often, but it's a huge disappointment when it does.

 

I admit I have too many dolls. I kept my collection down, and then I inherited money and it became harder to limit what I bought. Luckily, I only have dolls that are 1:6 scale or smaller. I save all their boxes. I have one room devoted to my collection that I keep very dark. I sell some of them, and then before so know it, I have replaced them with new dolls, and then some... I will admit I have about 90 dolls now, and, yes, I feel anxious if I think about how many I own. I have NEVER collected anything before, so it's really quite unlike me. I feel a little sad when I sell one, but also a bit relieved. I am attached to most of the ones I have and it would be difficult for me to sell them! I will be reading the other replies in this thread with interest. I'm guessing most people will be thinking, " At least I don't have as many dolls as she does! "after reading my post!

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? I wish I could limit it...but honestly, I haven't. I guess I haven't gone above traditional SD16/17 sizes.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? Clutter makes me anxious. I already have anxiety but there are days where I look at my room and think "I should recycle/donate/trash it all" but I also know a lot of my things have value and bring me joy.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? I'm an anxious person. I think it came from entering the job market during the economic depression. Being born in 1984, raised to believe I could do whatever I wanted, did well in school, and then to be told you're too educated to do this but too inexperienced to do that was pretty demoralizing. I can't achieve "the American Dream." No fancy car, no house of my own. I've come to terms with that part but in my early 20s, I felt like an utter failure and being an adult was overwhelming. So I cope by buying things but I also cycle in and out of collections. I'm trying to find a psychiatrist to help with my anxiety.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? I do have a lot of other collections. I can't enjoy them all at the same time. I'm also a little sad that I can't see all my dolls clearly - they're kind of layered atm.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? No, not really. Has more to do with "what will happen to these dolls after I die?" I'm going to be 40 and a lot of acquaintances passed away in the last year so I am very much so aware of what happens when you pass - your belongings get divvied up, trashed, or donated. I don't have kids - won't have any - but I have siblings. I want them to sell these and make something off of my loss.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? Yes but I never sell any of them. Other days I am happy to look at them. Other days I ponder who can go. Or where else can I display them.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? My mother - who I live with - sometimes says I have too many or should stop buying them (because yes I keep adding to my collection) but she also helps me take photos of them in the local park. My cat sitter said they terrified her so at least I know would be robbers wouldn't grab them.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? I need to downsize but I can't find any doll in my collection who I really want to get rid of. They all have possibilities that I haven't explored yet. But I have so many that I don't spend any time with them anymore. I get new outfits...and have yet to try them on the dolls. I think I am overwhelmed in general.

2026 update: I do see a psychiatrist and a therapist now. The buying has slowed down a lot. My goal this year is to go through the dolls' hoard of clothes and accessories and trying selling the ones the dolls and I don't like anymore. I think that will help a lot. After that, then maybe I can reassess who might need to find new homes. I have a few possible candidates but I am not trying to rush judgement because I don't want to be filled with regret. Off-topic fashion dolls still in their boxes I will definitely resell or donate because I don't ever plan to engage with them and other collectors/kids in need deserve them.

 

I think it's a common feeling indeed! Having any possessions in excess can be overwhelming and anxiety-inducing (personally, I purge stuff from my closet every year for instance), especially if they are not items you can "use up" or if they have a lot of monetary/sentimental value.

I set myself a doll limit of 4 and now have 5 Every now and then I get the urge to get a new "project"/doll but then do something with the ones I already have and realise that noooo, if I get any more I will get too overwhelmed to enjoy them and try to make something new for the ones I already have. I keep them in the boxes but the boxes take a lot of space, too, so the thought of getting more means clearing out some precious shelf real estate that I'd rather use for other things.

I'm in more stable housing now, but I've moved a lot and very often at periods - once stuff accumulates and exceeds a suitcase or two it also becomes a major hassle and money sink to move (need to borrow car/van etc) so I keep reminding myself that when new doll urges grow too big. I also feel like I can be super obsessed with dolls to the point that *that* gets very overwhelming so I'm also trying to limit the number of them so I can give fair attention to other activities and hobbies in my life, too.

All in all, I just want to keep numbers low because the hobby can't make me happy if it's overwhelming! And I want dolls to bring me happiness!

 

Hmm, this is actually a really interesting topic, I have often wondered a bit about it myself. I have been collecting my dolls since 2009, but it has only been in the last few years that I have started to look at my collection and ask myself "Should I slow down?" Or "Should I sell some?" The question alone honestly makes me anxious.

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
When I first started collecting, it was surreal because I honestly thought I would never own one. Now I have nearly 30 and when I think about that, it blows my mind. My husband loves to remind me of how many years I pined and hoped before I took the plunge, to remind me how much I adore my collection.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?

Two or three years ago I found out I have ADHD. Last fall I found out I am autistic as well. I have struggled with my mental health since I was a teenager and have been an anxious person my whole life. A lot of the anxiety comes from there.

A lot of it, however, also comes from having graduated college in 2008 when the recession hit. I pulled the typical did great, perfectionist "if it wasn't an a it wasn't good enough, I could do better" thing all the way through high school, but when I lost the structure and was on my own for college my mental health took a nose dive because suddenly I was struggling for the first time to maintain my balance.

I have a BFA in Illustration, it was all I ever wanted to do. I also have significant debt because of this choice. Should I have my collection with that debt? Probably not. At all. It is not fiscally responsible. I have had breakdowns and thought about selling it all to put to my loans a million times. My husband stops me every single time.

My dolls have an enormous place in my life. The longer I went unable to work in my chosen field, the worse my depression became until everytime I tried to draw or paint, all I could think of, all I could feel, were the oppressive weight and feelings of failure, of anger, of being worthless and unable to get anywhere in life. I still cycle through it a lot. It has been almost a decade now since I realized I no longer love my art and that it hurts me to try even though I still want to. It still makes me feel broken.

My BJDs have replaced my art, my innate need for creativity, in their own way. I have learned new skills (I am an alpaca wig-maker) and all my dolls (for the first 10 years anyway) were only allowed to be purchased on long layaways or secondhand in pieces if characters near and dear to my heart. The same ones who made me always want to do my art in the first place.

They have helped me cope with a loss that completely destroyed my perception of myself and who I am. It's a very complicated relationship but every one of my dolls I have worked hard for. Not once have I ever missed a payment or other responsibilities for my dolls. In fact I always pay a good chunk over the minimum of what I owe each month. But sometimes, when I still see that balance not move, when it's more than I even borrowed, when I know I have paid thousands over what I borrowed, I freak out when I look at my dolls and think I have too many and I should sell them all even though it would utterly devastate me.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?

I think I accidentally answered this with the above answer, lol.

It's a huge tangled web of situation, finances and mental health. But suffice to say, anytime something puts me in a downward spiral, the anxiety happens.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?

A little bit, yes. It drives me up the wall that when I am in a professional position, when things are not mine, I can keep clutter to a minimum and stick to an already in-use organizational system.

But the moment I get home? I crash and burn. When I lived at home with my family, I knew what was expected of me and I did it. It was routine.

Now that I don't? Now that I have more responsibilities and the struggles with AuDHD, I have the worst time with it. I am incessantly cycling through things slowly devolving until I feel claustrophobic with a need to take everything down to the base boards, clean, purge, reorganize. I'm doing it in my doll/art room yet again right now, actually.

Its maddening.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?

No, I don't think so. As much as I hate to admit it, I am materialistic and I like to be surrounded by beautiful things that help uplift my frequent depression. I think space may be more of a factor for me.

Does this anxiety come in cycles?

Oh, absolutely. I also cycle through things in this hobby as hyperfixations within the broader scope of my special interest.

The last few years have been all about wig-making, upgrading my (rather snobby LOL) collection even when new ones come in.

Do you feel judged by the people around you?

Ahaha, this one is fun.

Absolutely. When I first started to collect, I felt so immensely guilty purchasing my first doll that I had an anxiety attack pressing the buy button despite saving for months. I had kind of felt around about it with my parents for a long while before I went for it, and got the same thing most, if not all, of us have heard regarding the cost of the hobby.

Even when I moved out, I didn't want my family to know how many I had and tried to sneak them out without being seen. I always kept them out of view and even though my parents knew I had some, I don't think they thought much on it because I was pretty guarded about them.

That was a long time ago now, though. Through years of figuring things out about myself, therapy etc I find that I don't really care about hiding them anymore. To me they are part of who I am and after realizing that I didn't even know myself behind all the masking I do around people, I just couldn't do it anymore. I am tired of trying to be something different for every person, tired of people pleasing. I want to just be weird, unapologetic me. I am still learning how to do this every day, but suffice to say it's hard to miss me now when my hair is vibrant pink and purple, I love to show what I am working on with my dolls and will even carry one with me in public at certain places like the NY Faerie Festival or Renaissance festivals when I am all costumes up!

Do I always have a positive reception? No. Most of the time I do, though! It just makes my day when someone compliments me on it or wants to ask about my dolls. I have come a long way from hiding all the time and feeling so alone for it, my BJDs have helped a lot with it.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?

See, the thing is I don't have the impulse to sell. It is very, very hard for me to sell actually. I have only done so with one doll and it took me years to finally decide she needed a new home so she could be loved properly.

I have looked through my collection a thousand times, trying to figure out if I could part with any of them. It makes me distraught every stinking time. I am very emotionally attached to my dolls. I spend a long time bringing their characters to life. I put a lot of effort (and money, admittedly) into making them who I see. To me, it's one of the most magical, satisfying things. It's like I am taking my beloved characters out of my personal writing and finally getting to change them from my mind's eye to finally seeing them in person. They bring me SO much joy.

This is why my husband will not let me part with them when I have the anxiety attack, panic trigger days. He knows I will be brokenhearted and regret it forever.

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
I currently have a limit of 6 for my bjd’s and most of them are 1/6. I don’t have a limit for my smaller ones. I’m a collector of not only bjd’s but other art dolls, so whenever i run out of space i’m constantly finding a way for more room.
What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? (why having fewer dolls is supposed to soothe your nerves)
I actually have severe anxiety and having more dolls soothes those feelings.
Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? (e.g. your relation with toys as a kid/an experience related to theft/damage)
Since i don’t bring my dolls out I'm not afraid of theft on like the road, but i am afraid of like a house fire, or break in, or flood, sinkhole, tsunami, hurricane, or tornado. I live in a place with regular natural disasters… I have some severe trauma of my dolls and games being taken when i was a child, thats why i don’t take my dolls out anywhere.
Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? (e.g. you generally have lots of other collections/you want the dolls to look nicely displayed rather than stuck one on another)
I am constantly planning about where my action figures go, but i do extensive research and measure comparisons so that i can plan out before i get a new bjd or action figure.
Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? (e.g. you try to have fewer dolls that, in turn, require fewer accessories, etc.)
I either don’t know what this question means or no.
Does this anxiety come in cycles? (e.g. when you're anxious about something else, go through some personal issues - you tend to buy or sell away more dolls - rinse and repeat)
Constant, every second of the day even as i type this i’m thinking about them and what might happen
Do you feel judged by the people around you? (e.g., they perceive all the dolls as identical and cannot understand why you need so many variations of "the same thing", or "you should spend your money on something else", or "they take up so much space")
Definitely, and i have an example for this. My mom thinks its stupid and that i should stop wasting my money on plastic and that its really dumb, but my grandma (this extremely religious lady who you would never think would like such thing) absolutely loves bjds. Always commenting nice things about them when she passes my room and always asking me about the next one im getting. But she says sometimes people aren’t as open minded about things like this and it makes me ignore what others say about what makes me happy.
What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?
Main trigger is actually my depression, and since no one talks to me on a regular i like to collect things in a unhealthy manner.
I actually don’t normally resell anything from my collections, and in the past anytime i did I regret it and try to buy them back later. Luckily i haven’t done this with any bjd’s yet but it leaves me depressed and sad when i have to sell them. The only reasons I’ve ever resold them is because I thought I wasn’t good enough for them. Luckily I no longer think that anymore and it saved me alot of times from selling something i will regret and never get back.

 

I'd argue a lot of your anxiety described comes from outside factors, and the dolls itself are just a fallout victim (the moving, being with abusive ex-boyfriends, unsafe living conditions etc.).
I'd also be anxious as hell if I'd live through that AND would try to keep up with any hobby as emotionally investing as collecting these dolls. If I'd even be willing to keep up with that while everything around me regularly seems to go up in flames
As soon as you have fixed these circumstances, I am sure most of your anxiety towards the hobby would vanish, as you already described yourself.

Anyway, to your questions.
What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
I long ago set my personal soft limit at 20 BJDs, and yes, size is a factor. I am currently at 21 full dolls, and three floating bodies I just keep in case I ever have the itch for a cosplay doll or whatever. I do have a couple floating heads, but they are extras for the full dolls here and will never get their own body. However, even though I have 21 full dolls, only 13 of them are 70cm (my preferred size), and 5 are actually small pet critters. Those last five I barely count mentally. I also have 10 Blythe, but once again their small size makes it easier to manage.
If I had 21x 70cm guys I know the situation would look very differently, and the limit is also more applied to the bigger scales. I do still want to add a MSD, and I don't see the stress in potentially getting more pets. However, any new 70cm guy REALLY needs to hit for me to even contemplate buying him.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? (why having fewer dolls is supposed to soothe your nerves)
I am thankfully not really anxious, but there is a good reason for my soft limit. One is space, because even though I live in a decently sized apartment and have the luxury of a separate doll/hobby room, I only have so much space for actually neatly storing the dolls and their belongings in a way that pleases me. I like for my collections of any kind to be safely, yet visibly, stored. I can't do that with a hundred dolls shoved into a cabinet. The second one is, to me every new doll is like a new mouth to feed. I need to customize it, buy clothes, get a wig, eyes, all that stuff. I had some dolls I sold simply because I didn't have the energy and desire in me to go through that. And even the dolls I have here sometimes took years to reach a level that was satisfying to me, either because my own skills were lacking or I simply could not find the right artists to commission.
So it's a mixture of space, money and energy that prevents me from really getting more, and I know that if I'd push these boundaries that I definitely would get anxious. So I am stopping it before it can manifest.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? (e.g. your relation with toys as a kid/an experience related to theft/damage)
No, I don't think so. I have always been very picky, very organized, very "this needs to be perfect" about everything I owned and did. As a kid I already did the "putting my stuff neatly into glass cabinets" thing (I am pretty sure I am on the autism spectrum, go figure). The dolls are falling exactly in line with that, down to how I approach the hobby, store them and so on.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? (e.g. you generally have lots of other collections/you want the dolls to look nicely displayed rather than stuck one on another)
Yes, see above. I am very particular about how I organize, store and present my hobbies. I also collect Pokemon cards, anything in regards to Metal Gear Solid (my biggest collection), and that green Mameshiba bean-dog thing
However, the rest of my apartment is pretty bare in comparison, I have everything in white/gray, don't really "do" decoration, and I tend to get overwhelmed when I own too much stuff and it breaches containment (i.e. the doll and living room). As such I have reduced heavily what I buy for my interests (I don't buy action figures for example), and I do not start new hobbies or hobbies I know are just storage eaters (like collecting comics...you really can just put those into boxes).

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? (e.g. you try to have fewer dolls that, in turn, require fewer accessories, etc.)
No

Does this anxiety come in cycles? (e.g. when you're anxious about something else, go through some personal issues - you tend to buy or sell away more dolls - rinse and repeat)
Also no.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? (e.g., they perceive all the dolls as identical and cannot understand why you need so many variations of "the same thing", or "you should spend your money on something else", or "they take up so much space")
Not really. All my friends are either in the doll hobby, otherwise nerdy, or definitely maximalist with their decoration style. I am funny enough the most minimalist, clean and organized one in our group because I like for my stuff to be contained behind glass and for open surfaces to be minimally covered. I generally don't surround myself with people that have something against my way of living, life is too short for that.
My father once made a comment in regards to me collecting things overall, calling it childish, but my father is bitter as hell and could have really used a hobby besides going to work...so what does he know

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?
I thankfully don't really do impulse purchases, especially ones above a certain price range. My desire to own dolls has been greatly kept at bay by doing faceup commissions (you get to see and "play" with a doll you otherwise would have needed to buy, AND get paid for it on top!), their high price (I cannot justifying paying so much money for something random on a Wednesday afternoon without going through the motions first), and the fact that I need them all to fulfill a certain role (specific OCs in my projects, or visual role like "tanned with white hair and golden eyes"). There are too many cool dolls out there, and I have accepted I realistically cannot own them all and also would not feel fulfilled doing so.
Downsizing was for me always triggered when I felt overwhelmed by a project (the mentioned "I just cannot see myself paying all that money and putting in all that work to finish this"), or when I overall felt I had "too much". Both has thankfully not happened in years, simply because I learned what I need to be happy with my collections and how I have to limit myself for it to still feel comfy.

However, I would also argue that for 16 years in the hobby, my collection is overall pretty small and my list of "dolls I bought" pretty short as well. When I look at the list, I see roughly 50 faces I owned at some point. That also includes stuff I got gifted/won in contests. Some of these were heads only that I never bothered to get bodies for, and some I sold because I wanted to re-shell the character into something more fitting years later. That's overall 3 faces on average per year, and within the last years it's more like "a doll per year". That is pretty manageable

 

Really appreciate the thoughts above, everyone's answers illustrate how our feelings about our hobbies are so entwined with our past experiences, values and emotions.

I will only briefly speak to the clutter and sustainability part- as anyone with 2+ hobbies can attest, keeping things affordable, organized, and feeling like your stuff is actually getting used, is so hard to do! I vacillate regularly between wanting to get things ("it's on sale!", "the doll needs it anyway", "with this I could make a nice ____") and wanting to get rid of clutter. It's part of a general conflict between making space/time for nice things in my life and knowing that my lifestyle should probably be more sustainable. These feelings are certainly rooted in my childhood home, which was clean but had an overwhelming amount of stuff. I'm worried what we're going to do with it all when my parents have to downsize or if they pass away.

Nonetheless I went ahead and ordered 2 dolls this year I had to take at least a day contemplating each before hitting the order button...

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? (e.g. you can have 16 tinies and feel fine, but 6 SDs give you anxiety)
No hard limit but I'm feeling a little overwhelmed at the thought of adding another SD (4) DD (3) and even MSD (6). But I feel ok shopping for littles right now

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? (why having fewer dolls is supposed to soothe your nerves)
I think about the idea of packing them for a future move and it makes me stressed. The boxes are so big and I will never trust them with a moving company or left in some kind of storage unit. Also the cost of all their items will be to get them looking nice, I think how much more I could spoil them with the same amount of money if I limit them. But it's impossible to choose someone to leave

I also have OCD too I won't go into detail abt it because that doesn't get received well here. But it causes anxiety in general.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? (e.g. your relation with toys as a kid/an experience related to theft/damage)
My mom is a hoarder and often threw out our things to make room for hers, I think that strengthened my attachment to my toys, and besides I am not a good socializer too and maybe she targeted my toys because she thought I loved them too much to be normal. I don't think I'll become a hoarder, and no one's throwing out my things, but I still get some gut feeling like I can't manage these things and maybe I shouldn't be allowed to own them

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? (e.g. you generally have lots of other collections/you want the dolls to look nicely displayed rather than stuck one on another)
No, I don't think my dolls look cluttered at all and I'm improving my organizing system for their things more and more
I can tolerate more clutter than most, but I have no problem cleaning up when it bugs me!

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? (e.g. you try to have fewer dolls that, in turn, require fewer accessories, etc.)
Not necessarily, but all the packaging and shipping does really bother me in terms of waste. but the same can be said about a lot of other things in life. I make efforts to reduce my waste. with dolls I usually save whatever of the package I could reuse rather than send it to a landfill, and try to order several things together when I shop to not contribute too frequently to the demand for shipping. maybe I don't make much difference but a little is better than none.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? (e.g. when you're anxious about something else, go through some personal issues - you tend to buy or sell away more dolls - rinse and repeat)
Definitely spikes when I'm stressed I sold almost all of my dolls in a difficult period. But I have prevented myself from another massive sell off so far. Even when, as you said, sometimes I really convinced myself I'd be better off with 1 or 2, I have tried it already and know I won't be satisfied

Do you feel judged by the people around you? (e.g., they perceive all the dolls as identical and cannot understand why you need so many variations of "the same thing", or "you should spend your money on something else", or "they take up so much space")
No, I mostly get supportive reactions to my dolls irl and my collection is rather diverse in their looks. That's one of the points I think about when I shop - can this doll give me something none of my other dolls can, and do I actually care about whatever that is?

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? (e.g. too much persuasive talk from others, fear you won't have enough time for all the dolls, etc.?)
Sell off is usually something unrelated to dolls... Hardships.
But I don't really regret my impulsive buys?! some of my favorites were total impulse buys just because I fell in love with the doll on sight, no regrats some dolls I sold before, I considered ultimate grails, until I had them.. weird huh? So I don't fear the impulse itself, but I still take some time to evaluate and mull it over before I really hit the buy button especially if it's preorder period, I wait until the last day!

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? - Needs to be less than 10. Ideally I would be sub-5 but I doubt I'll get there. Does not depend on size.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? - Never asked myself this. Just a sense that I have "too much".

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? - I don't like owning a lot of things, it's probably related to that. I'm always looking for ways to downsize.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? - Not specifically.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? - No. I notice my buying seems to come in cycles, and in order to stay under the limit I have to sell things, but the selling seems to come after the buying so there's always a period of discomfort where I have way too much.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? - No.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? - What triggers this is my changing preferences in dolls. The dolls that have left me are dolls that no longer fit my style preferences or it's reshells of current looks for dolls I have in mind. Everything that exits does so for a reason, even if it's beautiful. There's only a few things I wish I had kept, far more often I'm happy I let things go.

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
I wasn't thinking of a limit until recently. I live in an apartment and really do not have much space for them. And now that I am looking for any nooks and crannies to put the crew (and constantly wondering where I've stashed my tools), I have started to wonder if I need to downsize. Size doesn't mean much to me, however. The dolls are based on my characters, and they are going to be hard to shell in either Tiny or Mini form. After all, mature tinies or mature minies are still harder to come by.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
Since they are all my characters, some days I feel worried because I can't really show equal love and attention to all of them. I can't display them all at the same time, really. It's silly to think non-sentient things with a fictional character projected onto them can "feel", but I see them almost like my kids. I want to be able to "support" them equally.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?
Maybe? I have moved many times in my life. Every time I move, I have to leave a few things behind by necessity. Perhaps this is something that has imprinted on my mind, but I can't say this has popped up consciously.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?
Not the way you've put it, no. I find it hard to throw out anything. My deceased grandfather was a hoarder. Clutter and I have a love-hate relationship. I have difficulties with blank walls and the "IKEA look" because they make me feel lonely and depressed. I try to control the clutter, but having some clutter makes me feel safe.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?
No. All things considered, BJD as a hobby has a relatively small carbon imprint. Resins dolls are rarely ever thrown out; they just change owners over the years (for example, I have a Volks F-09 who had a number of owners until she came to me. She's close to 20 years old.) Plastic waste is mostly seen in unrecyclable, one-time use situations, BJDs really doesn't play a bit part. The future where plastics are made from recyclable materials will also reduce this kind of existential dread for people, I am sure.)

Does this anxiety come in cycles?
Well, no. Overcrowding anxiety is a new thing for me. Then again , I accumulate dolls at a very slow pace. I've been in the hobby for about 10 years, I only have 15 dolls (that's including pets).

Do you feel judged by the people around you?
Folks around me don't really get my doll hobby (my colleagues at work are freaked out when resin deliveries show up, for example). Having somewhat superstitious parents also means that if anything can be seen as "unlucky, bad" around me, they will blame my dolls. They don't really know how much I've spent on my dolls (thanks to financial independence), but that's just easier this way. So judged? Absolutely. Are they a source of anxiety? Probably, but I'm working hard to shut that voice out.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?
About half of my dolls are second-hand, so I do actually go through some "impulse buys" in the sense that if I don't grab them when they're listed, they'd be gone. That being said, I only bring in dolls that I have a character for, so the one doll that fits the question was one that I traded recently, because the plans for that character somewhat fell through. I think the pattern will be "dolls leave when their characters go quiet", even if there's only been one incidence of this so far.

 

I’m a very anxious person, always have been and although certain factors have changed over the years (I’m now in my mid 50s) I still live in an almost constant state of anxiety. Only recently, i.e. the last few years have I come to realise I’m Autistic and also possibly have ADHD as well which explains a great deal of the why but unfortunately doesn’t help me actually cope as yet. The diagnosis is still in the ‘self’ stage but I’m working toward getting an official one and perhaps then the required help.
Anyway I shall try to answer the best I can.

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? I don’t know what my limit actually is but I am becoming rather anxious about just what I can cope with. Although I have a few larger dolls now (before it was mainly tinies) I’m not as comfortable with them as I feel I should be. I’m also starting to feel concerned about just how many dolls in total I have.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? A more recent reason for some of my anxiety is related to age and health. For example like most people my age my eyesight is going to hell and I’m struggling to do faceups the way I’d like. I also had a chest infection last year and part of this year that lasted over 7 months making me even more cautious and stressed out regarding so many things. Both of those have put a huge damper on my enjoyment of all of my hobbies as they’ve affected my creativity badly. They’ve also made me think about the future and all the niggling nasty little what ifs that tend to creep into the thoughts of the anxious mindset.
Other anxieties come from fear of breaking them, fear of having spent too much, fear of not treating them how I feel they should be treated, fear of being overwhelmed, fear of not being able to enjoy them, fear of how environmentally un-friendly they actually are, the list my brain comes up with is endless really!

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? Some will be. I never fitted in and was constantly mocked, criticised, picked on, called ‘Weird’ and such because I didn’t see things the way others did including my own family and teachers at school. A lot of my lack of confidence, lack of belief in my own abilities and general self loathing probably stems from that. Having favourite toys taken away from me and given to other siblings, other people or just generally discarded then getting told I was being stupid or selfish when I got upset I dare say also left quite a mental scar!
Other triggers for my anxieties are no doubt connected to the way my brain is wired up and the subsequent inability to deal with certain stimuli and situations.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? Oh yes, that definitely factors into the whole thing big time! Like most creative people clutter is a huge problem for me. I keep things ‘just in case’, hate throwing things away, don’t like being wasteful (part of that is also due to my upbringing) but then have a complete meltdown at the thought of trying to tackle and organise the chaos. I’m not joking about the meltdown either, I literally end up in tears and in a state of utter panic. Strange thing is in a workplace environment I’m incredibly tidy and organised but at home it’s the complete opposite.
Regarding my doll anxieties, the fact that I currently have no way of displaying them and making them easily accessible due to clutter has added to my stress levels and concerns.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? Some of it.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? Yes and no. Some of it is always there but some of it will be down to knock on effects from other factors. I do have a repeat pattern of wanting to do something, getting very enthusiastic and excited by it, starting that thing, then the moment something goes wrong I come crashing down and become filled with self doubt and loathing which then leads to a depressive cycle and shut down. I’m going through that just now with a couple of dolls that I’m struggling to get the faceups right on. With one it feels like everything that could go wrong is going wrong and although I’m trying to trust the process and battle through it’s really making me question myself.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? Always, I’ve never been one for following the expectations of others or doing things because everyone else does so I always feel I’m being judged.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? To be honest I’ve made very few ‘impulse’ purchases of that kind doll wise. Even those I’ve sold on have been thought about and mulled over before I’ve bought them.
Selling on for me usually comes after I’ve tried but failed to bond with a doll or I’ve just felt that they’re not getting the love they should from me.
I’ve only downsized drastically once and that was over 10 years ago when I sold most of my collection. The main trigger for that was illness, both mental and physical.

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? (e.g. you can have 16 tinies and feel fine, but 6 SDs give you anxiety)
I'm still exploring that and I anticipate this never being a solid answer as my life circumstances will change.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? (why having fewer dolls is supposed to soothe your nerves)
Hmmm I mean for me I guess it's more like thinking about how I can spend time with them and I guess because I'm still trying to find my way in the world having an expensive hobby can really over financially if you're not careful.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? (e.g. your relation with toys as a kid/an experience related to theft/damage)
Well, I had a massive collection of off topic dolls my mom gave away and ever since I've been longing for them back because I loved those dolls dearly. But my dolls every once in a while are an omage to my collection I feel at peace with this idk.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? (e.g. you generally have lots of other collections/you want the dolls to look nicely displayed rather than stuck one on another)
Oh I rarely like...I'm naturally a cluttery person so that doesn't bother me necessarily but I actually kind of am the opposite and feel bad if a doll lives too long in their box bc that's not fun.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? (e.g. you try to have fewer dolls that, in turn, require fewer accessories, etc.)
That's never been an issue for me, I reuse packaging where I can and keep boxes as I can which is pretty ecofriendly plus many massive corporations do so much more damage than I ever really could as an individual.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? (e.g. when you're anxious about something else, go through some personal issues - you tend to buy or sell away more dolls - rinse and repeat)
When money is tighter, yeah I've been known to see what can be sold off or doesn't work for my vision and I will sell, but nothing too major I'd regret of course.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? (e.g., they perceive all the dolls as identical and cannot understand why you need so many variations of "the same thing", or "you should spend your money on something else", or "they take up so much space")
Yes this is a major factor of my anxiety, my mom has been very against me getting more but luckily my boyfriend loves my dolls and asks me about them and hypes me up about them bless his heart. I admit they're expensive, but it's a burden I solely bear as best I can to circumvent a feeling of burdening other people with it.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? (e.g. too much persuasive talk from others, fear you won't have enough time for all the dolls, etc.?)
I can't necessarily impulse purchase because I'm such a planner about how a doll fits into my collection, but I feel it more when I see something I think is close to what I want or is something I have been looking for. But sometimes I don't like something and I know better than to keep forcing something.

 

I probably don't have the strength to answer everything, but there is definitely some anxiety. I'm a minimalist and therefore it really bothers me when my living space is smaller because it's taken up by dolls. They create clutter (they have more stuff than I do).

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? My limit seems to be 6 dolls, and it doesn't depend on their size though I only collect MSD and smaller-sized BJDs.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? I'm mixing this two questions because they're one and the same for me. I have a story about collecting obsessively in the past in another hobby related to poor mental health and I suppose I'm still scared I could fall into something similar regarding BJDs.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? I collect several other things besides BJDs, plus my husband also collects stuff, so keeping everything neatly displayed and organized and protected is definitely something that makes me anxious in general.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? Not really. I definitely try to by mindful and have only what my dolls need and sell what I don't need anymore so it can be loved by another hobbyist, but that's not a main concern for me regarding my collection.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? Not really. Luckily, my mental health (and overall life situation) has improved a lot since I had that problem with obsessively collecting stuff, and I have learned that buying things is not an answer when I'm feeling stressed (plus, I don't usually have the kind of spare money to buy a doll).

Do you feel judged by the people around you? A little but, luckily, the persons I care the most about (my husband and my sister) are completely on board with me collecting dolls and they even help me make decisions regarding my doll family.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? I have bought on impulse on the past twice because the doll was a preorder or a limited edition and I was pretty sure I really wanted them (even if I had just learnt about their existence), but I'm not a revolving-door owner in any way. In contrast, I had never put up for sale a whole doll (only bodies are such) till this year so I'm pretty new to downsizing and that's because I have a new doll I want and that one is no longer bringing me the same joy as for the past 10 years.

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? I had a limit. I didn't stick to it. Now that it's harder to sell dolls, I'm much more choosy about dolls I buy. I don't buy SD dolls anymore.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? (why having fewer dolls is supposed to soothe your nerves) I'm a mom raising some grade school boys and in general I think the ol mom feels of I could have spent this money on something for my kids comes into it. Other times I am thankful I have something that's just for me.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? (e.g. your relation with toys as a kid/an experience related to theft/damage) no not really

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? (e.g. you generally have lots of other collections/you want the dolls to look nicely displayed rather than stuck one on another) Nope I'm OK with my maximalist lifestyle as long as I can keep things dusted.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? (e.g. you try to have fewer dolls that, in turn, require fewer accessories, etc.) No.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? (e.g. when you're anxious about something else, go through some personal issues - you tend to buy or sell away more dolls - rinse and repeat)
Funds are somewhat limited so it's easy to regret a purchase when shortly after kid #1 needs a cavity filled and kid #2 needs a new bicycle etc. etc. I've also inherited a kid #3 recently who needs literally all the things. I'm not likely to make much personal purchases in the meantime.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? (e.g., they perceive all the dolls as identical and cannot understand why you need so many variations of "the same thing", or "you should spend your money on something else", or "they take up so much space")
No, but I also don't share my collection with everyone. Those that have seen it tend to keep their comments to themselves.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? I like all my dolls to be fairly unique, so sometimes a doll arrives and I find it really is too similar to the other dolls that I actually like better. Or maybe the scale doesn't fit. Or maybe the posing is obnoxious.

Kids keep me so busy, and I want them to have so many amazing experiences, so spending money on myself and my things will likely continued to be paired with Mom Guilt until my kids are grown.

 

It's like you're reading my mind here.

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? My limit has varied over my 16 years in the hobby. At first is was one, then three, then six, then 13.....then some how I hit 39, freaked out and sold a bunch and said under 20 at all times. Most recently though, I've realized it's not the actual number, but how I feel about the dolls. I can be totally overwhelmed at 16 when I'm not feeling connected to the majority of them, but I can also be content at 30 if they are all satisfactorily complete and "right" and I am connected. So I guess it's more about quality than quantity. Size does matter though, as I only have space for around 23 dolls in the 1/3 range (my main dolls), but a lot of space for the teeny tinies (under 20cm). A lot of the tinies are also off topic, so there are blurred lines as to how many I actually have. (Current breakdown: 22 SD (plus one incoming and 7 floating heads), 1 MSD, 1 YoSD, 8 on topic tinies, 27 off topic tinies (plus 6 incoming--these are the Penny's Box blind box bjds, so relatively cheap next to most bjds.)

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? I'm very picky about space, organization and neatness. Clutter stresses me out, and it feels dirty, even if everything is clean. I start feeling crowded, especially since they all have to fit in one tiny bedroom. All of the dolls have to have a space to sit, I don't want them stacked on each other (other than Natasha being in Opaline's lap). They also each have to have their own labeled tub for all of their individual things. I also am bipolar* and in my manic episodes, I tend to impulse buy a lot then regret it after the episode passes and start getting stressed and depressed by it all. Major buying and selling periods are often indicators of my mental health not being so good.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? Kind of? I fully admit I was spoiled as a kid with toys. My parents didn't regularly give me excess toys, but I did get a good haul for Christmas and birthday and occasionally something small here and there at random or for holidays, but my grandpa worked at the landfill and knew everyone in town, so when people he knew brought in boxes of toys from cleaning out their house, he'd just bring it home for us to play with instead of throwing out perfectly good stuff. So I ended up with a ton of toys, to an overwhelming level. And it was great! I continued collecting as a teen and young adult, mostly dolls, and at one point I had over 300 fashion dolls. I loved having all these things, but also often felt weighed down by it, but felt I'd never be able to let it all go. I sold almost all of these toys to get my first BJD, and it was so...freeing?...to have all that clutter gone and just get a few bjds. My place felt clean and neat for the first time in my life and it was so nice! So I do think back to those times and how it looked like a toy store exploded all over my place, and I never want to fall back into that mess again.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? Yes, absolutely. Dolls and video games are the only things I collect, and both are very organized. Everything else is pretty minimalistic, and there is no random clutter.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? Not really? I don't throw my dolls/doll stuff in the trash, I sell it secondhand.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? Yes. As mentioned above, I'm bipolar and it does often cycle with my depression or mania. I also often find myself buying stuff as retail therapy, then selling in a panic when I get overwhelmed or feel guilty for having so much. I tend to sell a lot when I'm feeling hopeless, too.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? No. My sister and most of my closest friends are in the hobby and get it, and my mom, husband and friends not in the hobby have their own hobbies and collections and get it. I don't really give a damn what others think about it. Not their money, not their business.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?
Purchases: Usually when I want "retail therapy", am manic, have a big chunk of money that doesn't need to go to anything else, or get too many creative ideas at once and can't seem to focus on anything other than obsessing about making these ideas come to life
Downsizing: Usually when I'm overwhelmed with clutter, feeling crowded, wanting freedom from material things, depressed or stressed out. Or needing money. Sometimes too when I'm stressing about a major life event. My life is pretty stable, I've been in my house for 15 years, with my husband for 18 years. But we've had a few false alarms over the last few years where I did think we might be moving or having to make some major changes, and it would be a lot easier without 50 dolls....(mostly off topic tinies, but that's besides the point.)

*Sorry to bring my personal mental health into this, and if I need to delete that part, I will. I usually try to keep that to myself, but I definitely think it's relevant to this topic. Bipolar and anxiety highly contribute to my buying and selling habits, and my doctor is sending me for ADHD evaluation this week, which would also explain a lot of my activity in the hobby. Maybe one day this revolving door will close.

 

Definitely a worthwhile question. What 'too much' is can look vastly different between people. I love hearing in-depth about the why's and in's and out's of other people's collections too. Some folks have that one, single doll, or two-to-four dolls that they spoil for years, and the idea of more just does not appeal.

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? I don't have a hard limit on most things- cost within my feasible means, size usually no taller than 75cm, etc. - but when it comes to number, it was an average of 85 elves for the last few years, and I knew it was too many. I'm now flirting with 70 again, but had it down to 64 / 65, and I'm hoping to one day keep it around 40-50, maybe lower. It sounds like a lot, but the important thing to remember is that I count all of my elves including the small ones, which make up a significant chunk of that number despite taking up the least space.

In an ideal world, I don't think I'd own more than twenty-some, and preferably less than that. But at this point in time I think it will take me a while to get there, if I ever do, simply because it's harder to send out than to bring in.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? Admittedly some of it comes down to money. I have never been able to find a job that pays high enough for me to move out and away from my family. The elves are expensive tenants, but the depressing thing is that if I stopped spending any money on personal hobbies and saved every cent today, or even two, five, seven years ago, I would still not be ahead enough to make it in the long run. Bills / living expenses are simply too high versus what you make in the here and now.

The stagnant state of our secondhand market versus the over-saturation of constant preorders is anxiety-inducing. A hobbyist can no longer purchase something and know that it will sell if it doesn't work out. Every time I bring in a new doll now, even one I've wanted for years, I question if I've made a mistake as I watch things I no longer use sit on the marketplace. I have also lost quite a bit of money to scammers in the last four years- over $1000, down from over $2000 which I was able to coerce via bank assistance / threatening legal action. With the updated US income tax laws now backing us all into a corner when it comes to reselling our possessions, I feel forced to 'get out' before things get any worse.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? It's a combination of past and present. Right now the BJD hobby doesn't feel like as good a place to be, to me. There's an unceasing uptick in bad behavior, thankfully more in the wild west of social media than DoA. Also a general lack of creativity. Where you used to have posts about doll characters, stories, crafting, etc., it's box opening after box opening, placing the emphasis on the getting rather than the having.

I have been at the receiving end of (mostly) seller / buyer -related bad behavior, and feel a general depression when handling my dolls that was never there before. The outpour of creatives in our community always helped fill the lack of other nearby hobbyists to enthuse with.

I have also had to sell off half or more of my elves on multiple occasions between jobs, or to pay for various expenses. It's part of the cycle, but it also makes me question in retrospect why I bought so many before selling others while my income was good in the first place.

There is also the matter of space:

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? Yes. I have taken the initiative to downsize other collections in the past / present, and keep everything within a relatively restricted space. There are certain shelves for Transformers, designated containers for various action figures... BJDs have a set of cabinets, vinyl dolls and Blythe have one, and there's a box for off-topic 3D printed ones. I avoid stuff like the blind box BJDs entirely, and try to put that money back towards my 'main' dolls.

The thing is, I am always taking the initiative. I am the self-starter. If I don't, nobody else does, and no matter what I try to get rid of, it becomes an uphill battle if a certain member of the household is interested. I live with a very clean, very organized, well-meaning hoarder. And I cannot deny that I fear becoming like her, especially when I see myself clinging to things I haven't used in a while. Any collection that gets to this size becomes the subject of intense self-scrutiny later, because I live in the kind of house where all the primary school craft projects, all the lost teeth, all the x-in-law's outdated clothes... everything gets packed away because, "We'll need / want that later!" or "It was a gift!"

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? I can't claim to be knowledgeable or politically correct on this issue. But I do recycle, and believe that finding more eco-friendly solutions to what we make, use, and touch is common sense- whether or not the globe is warming, we should make the best effort possible to care for and sustain the place we live in.

That said, I definitely see the lack of sustainability within the hobby. Between the wobbly world economy, the wide and ever-expanding catalogue of recasts and their influence, and again, endless preorders 24/7, it's hard not to see the hobby as much more than a shaky foundation. Like fast fashion but without unfortunate third world countries to dump unwanted / used product on. What I would like, more than anything, is to downsize without regret, stick to some elves I enjoy, and lose the urge to paint / photograph new ones. To gain back more of the creative energy I once associated with them.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? An excellent question. I think it stopped coming in cycles a while ago and became a permanent resident as the number of dolls that stayed grew during a period of having a stable income at the expense of health, well-being, and time.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? Only sometimes. I get occasional complaints from the family; "You could have put that money towards bills" or "You could have gone back for a degree by now". But at this point, even they admit that the current economy / job situation is a wash, and they don't know what I'd pursue at uni. We just set a record for unemployment within the state, and I would never have pursued the jobs we have with my skillset.

Space has never been a complaint because I've always stayed within my lane. Our house is full of windows; doing otherwise would mean premature yellowing.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? Downsizing Triggers include:

• 'This cabinet is too crowded'
• 'I'm running out of shoes'
• 'If I keep <current elf>, that will lessen space for <future elf>'
• 'I haven't played with this one in so long. Do I really want to keep them?'
• 'I have no money and too many elves'
• 'This job is toxic and I need money for an exit'

Impulse triggers are harder to pin down. I used to struggle with boredom once my collection neared completion. I wanted something to fiddle with and work on, so I'd buy a new head or two. But then I'd need bodies, and before I could get them, a head or doll I'd actually planned would come up, and so I'd end up with three or five projects instead of one. And before I could get them all done, the process would repeat itself, requiring an impossible amount of hypothetical bodies and space. When I ended up storing a couple of bigger dolls in padded bags and had three boxes of floating heads, that was when I finally said, "Okay, this number needs to shrink."

I also struggle with seeing a thing and intensely wanting it. A lot of the features I like in sculpts used to be rarer / reserved for limited release, and I need to accept that is no longer the case. Nevertheless, the 'Fomo' syndrome has become harder to fight now with the sudden nostalgia boom for certain 'vintage' BJDs, more artists only doing one preorder, and companies or dealers suddenly shutting down or going rogue. With the last three BJDs I've brought in, I have made myself wait for a day or days before taking the plunge, to see if the urgency goes away. If it doesn't, I feel more confident that this is a good purchase, but if I can forget about it, then obviously that money was meant for other things.

Something that helped this was shortening my wishlist. Looking at it and saying, "But realistically, how much of this would you want to own on top of what you already intend to keep?" And that one question cut it down to a fraction. It's helping me think through what I set aside too.

 

well I am not very much the intented audience for this because I went through several house moves and my space at the house I live now is more limited than before plus many more reasons as less time for collections etc but I thought to add my experience on this

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? I started buying bjd's about 15-16years ago and had not set a limit but in my mind I would be comfortable with a shelf unit *(70x30x200cm) full of them (space wise not money wise lol) but back then I had more space and no responcibilities kids etc so now my limit is far smaller like one shelf of bjd which is about 5-6 sd yes size matters like 1sd is for me about like 1,5-2msd or 3yosd

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? Space and change of interests back in time a doll room seemed amazing so 1shelf unit was the bjd stuff , 2 the several fashion doll types , 1the other types of dolls and figures and my room still had 4shelf units full of books and one with cd's and I used to feel amazing in such a space .... not anymore. Having a family means linen, sheets , towels , blankets far more than when I was alone those are stored in the bedroom , the living room cannot be my "doll room" it is a family room . The "linen" utilities and all my stuff don't fit comfortably in my bedroom and my stuff cannot be in any other room so naturally everything has to be reduced but it creates much anxiety the "how" to do so and "what stays what goes"

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? Well having moved house 3 times didn't help I know moving house is a bit out of theme in the thread but even if I was going to a bigger place the experience of having to pack and tidy everything so many times it would be anxiety causing for me , I'm not good at tidying up AT ALL , it stresses me beyond imagination.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? Yes and that's why I don't have anxiety only for my bjd but for everything in my collections , I sold or gifted most of my books and cd's opting more for e-books and libraries instead for my reading and reducing my fashion dolls collection the bjd's cause me more anxiety because as they are more expensive I have to try to sell them second hand I can't just pop in a library or a charity as with books/fashion dolls and give it away if they are not selling and take up space and that's an extra level of anxiety for me taking nice photos trying to remember all those years later what year I got everything and if it had a coa especially floating heads are a headache but it has to be done one can post online a bunch of barbies and slap a low price tag on and say barbies for sale but you can't get some floating heads price them low and slap "bjd heads for sale" online it gives all the wrong vibes so no matter how high or low I'm willing to price them they have to be identified correctly and have their info right which is stressfull.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? no I know that my dollls won't end up in garbage even if I go crazy and want them out I can always gift them but I will feel enormous guilt If I don't even try to sell them in at least 40-50% of their original price , and just gift them because I had done great sacrifices econimically to purchase them

Does this anxiety come in cycles? yes when I stumble upon something , when I have free time and I'm thinking now I could probably try to take some pics of this doll to sell it and generally times with tight money and times that my room is more untidy even if the untidyness is unrelated to the dolls and the doll are perfectly tidy my anxiety kicks in.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? yes people around me judge me but that's so old that it doesn't affect me anymore , I have dolls , they don't like it , I know they don't and they know I know it and don't care much .... it's more that now I don't like my room like that it's like I'm turning into them and when they judge me I don't care but when I judge me then I have to change.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? the trigger was "limited sculpt just for one month" , "discontinued sculpt now or never" some of my dolls and many of my floating heads were either to be discontinued, limited or in offer and I was planning that on day I will get bodies and have my tidy nice bjd shelf unit and that in like 40years from then it will be amazing at the end I realised that every day amazing sculpts are discontinued and amazing new ones get sculpted so it was a bit futile though except the floating heads few of my dolls are impulse purchases I look at you soom and your limited ones. I want to reduce my dolls not only by rehoming my "impulse purchases" but many of my conscious ones which at the time I loved but in my current circumstances I think I don't need and don't have enough space or time for.

*EDIT 1shelf unit = a 5-6 shelves bookcase or shelf unit about 70-80cm wide and 2m tall , one shelf is 1 shelf of such a shelf unit

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? I have a limit - space, space, space! And of course, if I can afford it and if I have the opportunity to buy it. I don't have a lot of space for my things, and I often stress about how it's all going to fit. I think I've been pretty savvy in getting more than should fit into small spaces, but at one point, I know I can't "bend" the space any more.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
I mentioned space already and having plenty of room is really what stresses me out the most.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?
Most likely. I've either had to part with my dolls and things in the past due to circumstances or felt that I should part with things because of circumstances (even when I really didn't need to.) This has created a cycle of stress for me where I fear I am gathering too much stuff and will then have to down size and once again re-live parting with things that I love that I might not ever have back.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?
Clutter - it is a seemingly never ending battle. I like maximalism. I like things everywhere. I don't like blank cold spaces. But just because you have a lot of stuff doesn't mean it has to look cluttered. So I would say I worry a lot that my stuff looks too much like clutter.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?
Come again?

Does this anxiety come in cycles?
Yes. I don't know why but it comes in when I least expect or sometimes right on time.

Do you feel judged by the people around you?
Not by my close albeit small circle. I know there are people who would judge me, but I don't really care.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?
I really don't impulse buy. I might go crazy when I see something that is perfect but the I never buy without a painful amount of thought. It has to be perfect and even when I know I made the right choice, I still worry. And yes, it's about space. The triggers behind down sizing, are again, space. As well as feeling stressed out about how many dolls need things, like wigs or shoes or clothes. But that usually passes and I am relieved I have learned to never act when I am feeling anxiety like that. This has kept me from making the same stupid mistakes I made in the past, many of which I still regret.

 

It's really nice seeing relatable commentary from other autistic/neuro-diverse people - reading this thread has really made me feel less alone in my struggles with the hobby ❤︎

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
The largest amount of dolls I've had at one time was 5, which did begin feeling a bit overwhelming for me.
I like having a large wardrobe for each character, and that can get a bit hard to juggle when you have so many dolls. Sort of like, "Oh I want to get X doll this item! But... Y doll hasn't had anything new in so long " - I kinda felt like a neglectful parent after a certain point.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
Buying new dolls always makes me feel a little guilty and anxious, since I always feel like it could go to savings instead. My spending by no means impacts my 'necessary' expenses, but I am still considerably young and worry that maybe someday the money I spent would have been better in a 'rainy day' fund.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?
I think the guilt of owning nice, expensive things does come from growing up poor and living in a country where this type of luxury isn't afforded to many. Spending some people's monthly paycheck 5x over on what is not a need can sometimes make me feel immoral, like a bad person.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?
I don't think so - I grew up with two hoarding parents, I live considerably 'light' in regards to decor/collectables to avoid falling into that hole.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?
A little, I suppose - but I live a somewhat 'green' life that I think counters the effects the production of my dolls may have.

Does this anxiety come in cycles?
I would say so. Right after a new purchase, normally.

Do you feel judged by the people around you?
No. I'm pretty reclusive, so the only people who really know about my hobby in real life are either neutral or support me fully, for which I am very thankful.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away?
"Pretty thing? I want the pretty thing!!" - when I first joined the hobby, I really didn't know what I liked or what aesthetic I wanted to go for, so I just tried them all. It didn't seem to matter if I really liked them all that much, I just had to try and figure it out. I was/have been a revolving door for a while, but I have since sat down and thought more about it - what I truly like vs what I just like to look at. I don't have to own every doll I think is pretty, just ones that truly speak to me.

What are the triggers behind downsizing?
There are two, I suppose.

If something goes wrong - for example a hybrid I had planned didn't work, something broke, I can't figure something out - I feel bad about my mistake and want to purge everything related to that doll, it's even worse if I own multiple from one brand (it was bad when I collected vinyl dolls) because I will start seeing them all in that negative light even if they were perfectly fine before.
Or I go into a sort of panic response if there are any 'potential threats' in real life. A part of my PC died? Oh well - I will now sell off my entire collection even though I don't need to. Compensating, I suppose, for the necessities expense.

I have sold off dolls I regret because of these bad habits, but having honest reflections like these really help work through the issue.

 

I’ve been in the hobby for over 18 years and I’m only just now experiencing this. I have over 50 dolls now and I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed. I’ve been thinking lately of selling off most of my MSDs because I haven’t touched them in about 2 years. I still like the dolls but I’d rather spend my limited free time with my other dolls.

I’m not sure what to do because I dont want to regret selling them and I don’t know if maybe I’m just in a slump but I also don’t want dolls sitting around collecting dust. I think I might just slowly selling them off. I’ve identified a few that I definitely don’t see myself regretting selling so I’ll start with those and maybe put the others away in boxes and see how I feel about them after a few months.

The idea of having a smaller collection of very spoiled dolls really appeals to me but I think it’ll take time for me to part with some of the ones I used to really enjoy.

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? I don't have a set limit but I think if I start to feel uncomfortable, that would be it! I have a lot of dolls and all in different sizes. I think size does matter in this case since most of my dolls are under 1/3. Most are easy to store and I can just put 1/6 and 1/12 in book boxes if I tossed out their original boxes.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? It's the issue of space for them and their boxes.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? No.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? No, but I do want to keep my things clean and not have them just to gather dust. I often clean and reorganize, and as long as they fit into their designated spaces, it's fine.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? A bit. I try not to order new accessories and limit it to me making something from my fabric stash or buying secondhand.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? Yes. Sometimes I feel like I have too many things, but I just really needed to reorganize them. Dust them off, check if they need to be restrung and any other maintenance needed.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? No. And if I did, I would not care since almost everyone has a hobby that would be considered a 'waste of money'

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? I follow the KonMari method. If it no longer sparks joy, I will sell/repurpose it. For impulse purchases, I managed to mostly curb it. Most my impulse buys are usually for dolls or accessories that I have already wanted and now just have a variant available, or it's cheap. Honestly, impulse buys aren't really a thing for me anymore since I have a rule that it must sit in the cart for two weeks minimum before I make my decision.

It's easy to get overwhelmed for collecting, and it's going to happen to every collector eventually. I do well with a larger collection, so I have a higher threshold for this. I do worry about how many dolls I have and are on preorder though. I have a rule that if I can no longer put all of their boxes into their storage spaces, then I am no longer able to buy dolls until I sell some. The problem is, I love all of the ones I have right now and they all spark joy. My fomo has decreased by a large amount, and missing out on dolls no longer bothers me since I already have so many dolls I love. If you feel overwhelmed, I recommend reorganizing and see how you feel afterwards.

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
I started out in this hobby setting arbitrary size and number limits, but slowly over time I realized this just wasn’t me. I needed the freedom to collect my characters freely and without limitations…letting the only limit be my imagination and creativity. I was creating a fantasy world here, so different sizes for fanciful beings made perfect sense. My limits are instead space related. I have created several artistic vignettes throughout my home, and that’s where the dolls live…so no doll is purchased without a preplanned place for it to be. I’m very strict with myself about this because I don’t want my displays overly cluttered. Every new character must 1st, enhance the story and 2nd, fit in neatly. I’m a maximalist at heart but everything must still be tidy and make sense.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
My anxiety only happens when a doll doesn’t “fit” in, story-wise or space-wise. That drives me crazy. And it will permeate my thoughts, niggling at the back of my brain until I can resolve the issue. I call it a “dollemma” and I’ll work on it for as long as it takes to come up with a solution. Sometime it can take weeks and almost always involves a very long walk to work it all out. Only if it can’t be resolved will I finally sell the doll…but this hasn’t happened in years.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?
Most likely. I came home from school one day at the age of 12 to find that my mother had suddenly sold all my dolls (every last one of them) to buy herself a new cocktail dress. Her justification was that they were neatly stored in my closet, so I was obviously too old and didn’t want them anymore. I’d thought they were safe and it broke my heart. So today no doll ever gets “put away” in my own home…all must be constantly on display in an artistic way. If one doesn’t fit in, it causes me no end of angst…and the issue must be resolved in one way or another.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?
Not really. I have a large collection after so many years in the hobby. It will be 60 dolls once the last of my preorders finally arrive home. And although I’m a maximalist at heart, everything is kept neat and tidy by design. I’m one of those “a place for everything and everything in its place” sort of gals. I’m very cognizant of my home’s feng shui…everything must flow smoothly and peacefully. So managing this large a collection is no small feat, but it works. My only struggle happens when a doll character doesn’t “fit” for some reason.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?
Not at all. My husband and I (as seniors) have lessened our carbon footprints by completely giving up driving in favor of our city’s excellent eco-friendly public transit. So I figure we’re way ahead of the game on this issue. I also make almost all of my dolls’ wardrobes myself (I love exploring fashion.) And nearly all my doll displays and vignettes have been created by repurposing second-hand furniture purchased at charity shops.

Does this anxiety come in cycles?
Only in that if something doesn’t fit physically or character wise, it will drive me crazy until I resolve it. So if a new doll comes in, that’s always a risk. I’ll figure it out and adjust their character or their story or their space eventually. But because my space is so limited and precise, it’s always a possibility I have to be aware of when a new one comes in.

Do you feel judged by the people around you?
Heavens no…they wouldn’t dare!

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away?
I’m very good at resisting impulse buys. I’ve always had as my #1 rule: no character, no purchase. So any doll I’ve brought into my home has a definite purpose in mind, and this helps keep mistakes to a minimum. It’s only when a doll “jumps character” on me that it can be an issue. This just happened recently as a matter of fact, and I did consider selling her after years and years of not selling any. But I let this particular “dollemma” sit with me for awhile until a new character presented itself, which she smoothly and happily then slid into. I was very happy about it because I really loved this head!

What are the triggers behind downsizing?
My downsizing has always been dictated by upgrades or refinement of my collection. Like I’ve said, everything simply has to “fit” character and space wise. They have to tell a story…my story…and if they don’t, it would be time for them to go. But fortunately I’ve honed my personal aesthetics and display spaces so well by this point, I haven’t had to sell a doll in years despite having a large collection.

 

Awww, I feel honored that my crew gets remembered! And I don't mind discussing the deeper things, I'm just not always sure where to draw the line. But related to that: I just got my ADHD diagnosis yesterday, and it actually explains so many things about how I handle the hobby and my never ending revolving door. Now that we're working on that, I'm hoping it'll help me settle into a more permanent crew I can work with and improve for the rest of my time in the hobby!

 

-- What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
I shell characters with my dolls, and currently I want my crew to be a single ensemble cast. So my limit depends on how many characters I can hold in my imagination at one time. Currently, the number seems to be around 9-10 characters, so, 9-10 dolls is my limit. I currently own 7 BJDs, and have a full doll and a floating head on order. In fact, I might end up selling 1 of my current dolls.

Yes, my limit depends on size. Minis and especially tinies are not significant in my imagination -- I have a 1/12 tiny BJD that I barely remember that I own (that's the 1 doll I may sell later). Since I want to shell OCs, I've banned myself from buying anything smaller than 1/3 because I can forsee that I'll lose interest in them, forget they exist, and they'll end up languishing as clutter, which will affect me negatively. My favourite size, 1/3, is too big to ignore -- I have and will move these dolls on if I have no more reason to own them.


-- What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
Someone earlier in the thread said that every doll is like a new mouth to feed -- I agree. I'm very hands on with my dolls, I love to pose them and take photos and tell stories through them. So not only do I have to also make/buy wig, eyes, clothes for a new doll, I also have the "ongoing service costs" of playtime, storytelling, character development and relationships with the rest of the cast.

I love these characters I've made and shelled into dolls, I want to keep servicing them -- but I have only so much attention, time, energy and money to go around. Too many characters in my head, too many unfinished projects, too much ongoing service costs... all are sources of anxiety, which leads to overwhelm and resentment of the things that cause that discomfort. I don't want to resent my dolls, so I'm currently doing everything I can to stay in my peaceful, not-overwhelmed, happy place with them. This involves taking a default stance of not buying a new doll when I don't have any reason to get one.


-- Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?
Highly doubt it.


-- Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?
As mentioned above, it's mostly the mental "clutter"/overwhelm that affects me. But in terms of physical space, I'm a minimalist at heart and I don't have a collector personality, the only true physical collections I have are books and BJDs. And even my book library consists of two 1metre-tall bookcases -- small by most people's standards.

I periodically go through destash/spring cleaning phases where I get rid of old things and I'm pretty ruthless about it. (When my two bookcases get full, I'm more likely to cull books instead of buy a new bookshelf. Same with my wardrobe, and other parts of my home.) I can see myself becoming ruthless with my dolls, and I don't want to be, so again, I take a default stance of not buying dolls in the first place.


-- Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?
No. If I have any anxiety over this, it has to do with living modestly, within my means, without spending money frivolously.


-- Does this anxiety come in cycles?
I go through the occasional existential crisis when I wonder if anything is worth doing, and maybe I should just purge my life of all my acquisitions. When this happens, there's a risk that my dolls will get caught up in it, but they don't trigger it.


-- Do you feel judged by the people around you?
No, on the contrary, everyone around me loves my dolls and has been supportive of this hobby. External validation (or lack of) isn't an issue for me.


-- What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?
I'm not prone to impulse buying, but in the rare time it happened, it had to do with poor mental health and looking for a way to numb pain. I didn't buy the doll for its own sake (though I kinda liked it), I was trying to use it to cope with bigger life issues. Unfortunately dolls can't really address life and mental health challenges. When they stopped being "helpful" and I realized what I was doing, I sold them.

I haven't bought so many dolls that I'd need to "downsize" the collection (selling a doll I didn't bond with doesn't count). Actual downsizing for me is triggered by that existential crisis mentioned above, but so far, my dolls haven't been affected by it. I hope they'll never be.

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? My limit is about 12 or so from what I've noticed, and it definitely depends on size. Tinies are fine and MSDs are a little stressful, but I can't have more than 2 SDs.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? When my room gets cluttered it negatively affects my mood, so having a lot of dolls allows it to feel cluttered faster.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? Nope.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? Not really, but I have only so much space and when I get overwhelmed I start to panic.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? No. If I was that eco-conscious, I wouldn't buy dolls in the first place due to rumination.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? Yes, I have a pretty nasty buy-sell cycle.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? Not really. The people in my life are supportive of my hobbies. I do experience feelings of shame that I can buy dolls pretty easily while others can't, though. So I feel bad that I have those periods of buying things just because my brain is telling me to do it.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? I have a mood disorder, so I'll go through periods of wanting to buy everything, and when that passes I tend to find that I didn't really like/need the doll for my collection in the first place.

 

It’s really comforting to see everyone’s responses to this. Make me feel less alone!

1) I don’t know what my limit is yet, but I think I’m reaching it. I am currently about to have 20 dolls, and I think that might be as many as I’d like to have at least with my current living situation. There are two other sculpts I can currently think of that I would really like to own someday. But other than that, as much as I really love some sculpts I’ve seen, I think I could say no to them. I’m hoping to reduce my accumulations in the coming years to only 1 or 2 per year. I don’t think I’d like to ever go over 30.

2) I feel anxious personally because I look at everything I have, and I just think: man, I am so incredibly blessed. There are so many people in the world that would never be able to afford even one of these. I’m a charitable person and try a lot to give back, but even so, I still feel guilty for having what I have. And at the end of the day, they’re just possessions, too. They won’t last forever. So for me, it’s walking the line of “am I being excessive? Could I be using my resources in a better way to help other people? Is this selfish? Could I be using this money for something more ultimately valuable?” That sort of thing. Lots of deep-thinking.

3) I don’t really have any particular triggers. I’ve always had all I wanted, though when I was a child, my father did give all of my toys to my sisters when I did not visit him “enough” (separated parents). That might have had some influence on my desire to collect, but I don’t think it was a very prominent one. I’ve been very fortunate.

4) Ugh, it definitely has a correlation to my struggle with clutter! But that’s because I live in a small space. I’m still at home, and I just have my room, so I am most definitely running out of it. My parents have been generous allowing me to store things in the attic and basement, and so has a good friend of mine. But every time I put something away it adds to that feeling of having too much, of needing to give things away. When I move out, I’m sure there’s going to be a lot of tough calls with my other things. I’ve really been feeling like I need to have one thing I collect and focus on, and that has helped some with the anxiety. I’ve told myself I will not buy anything, even if I really like it, unless it furthers my goals in this hobby and honestly that’s been really helpful. (Barring necessities here of course)!

5) I don’t really tie BJD’s into sustainability. There’s so many other things that are a worse problem and I do my best to do that; like not buying from places like Shein and Temu.

6) Other anxieties for sure trigger my collecting anxieties. It’s sort of that concept that your brain spirals, once you think of one bad thing, you keep going and going. I’ve been doing my best to cut that out too!

7) I do feel somewhat judged by people around me. Overall, my friends and family are very supportive of my collecting, but I fear the same thing, that they will think I’m excessive and selfish really for the money I spend. That really concerns me.

8) Triggers for impulse buying? Stress. Work stress, life stress, any kind of stress. I thankfully am not a doll impulse buyer, but I do sometimes impulse buy accessories when I am feeling down. I’ve helped that habit a lot by making myself pause and think: what doll will use this? Does this actually match the aesthetic I have in mind for someone? Do I want this for a reason other than it being a good deal? It’s really helped.

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
I have an arbitrary number of 13. I was born on the 13th so it’s like a lucky number lol However size contributes too. 13 MSD’s would be too many and I cap them at 5. In my mind 2 tinies equal a MSD So it’s okay to have more of them

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
If I have too much stuff in general I get a little claustrophobic. I like decor and pretty things but they need room to shine. I don’t like crowding my things. I even make sure there are gaps between my hangers lol I just like that balance of stuff and space!

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?
No, other than my generalized anxiety disorder maybe?

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?
I used to struggle with clutter and holding onto things. But I’ve learned to be more minimalist and I’m getting better at striking the balance I’m comfortable with.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?
Sometimes I think about my “footprint” and all that. But I think a lot of it is a bunch of greenwashing anyways. Us buying small batch art dolls is nothing compared to all the other plastic stuff being made.

Does this anxiety come in cycles?
I’m moving somewhat soon so I’ve been nervous about how I will transport them all. Kinda makes me want to sell a few. Usually, the urge to purge comes on if I have them haphazardly displayed or they look too crowded on the shelf.

Do you feel judged by the people around you?
Thankfully no. My family has always been pretty easy going. My small group of friends also have their odd hobbies, interests, or collections. Anybody who thinks I’m weird most be keeping their comments to themselves lol

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?
My perfectionism triggers the need to downsize. Funny enough my impulse purchases aren’t usually the first to go. It’s the ones who I overthink and plan for I guess during the wait time I build them up in my mind and when they don’t live up to expectations I pass them on. I think of the dolls I have now the instock and second hand dolls outnumber the preordered ones.

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? My limit went from "Just these two" to over 30 in my first stint with the hobby. Then, after getting very sick and having to focus elsewhere for the better part of 7 or 8 years, I was able to return with a renewed vigor. Now, I went from limiting myself to 12, changing that to 20... and now realizing that the number isn't what matters at all for me, it's the connection and having them all be complete and fully fledged characters with their own "lives". Without that, they're pretty hunks of resin that collect dust and I freak out, so it's really more about me feeling they're complete than it is the number in total. Size IS a big factor, though. All my 1/3 dolls are kept on a 5-shelf bookshelf, which means only 4 shelves because the bottom is pointless unless I want all their legs sticking straight out. If I cram them in, I have space for 5 per shelf (4 per shelf is better, but in a pinch...), so top end is 25 for 1/3 dolls. Tinies is a different story, since I can stick them anywhere. Right now, all my tinies are OT and I don't really even count them in my total. (Current breakdown: 23 SD (plus 1 in her box while I work on a new character for her, 1 on layway and 1 in the works), 1 MSD (who I also don't count since he's not really a character, he was my first doll and I can't let him go), and 11 off topic tinies (plus 1 incoming. These are pets off Etsy or Blind Box kids, so all really cheap))

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? When I start feeling the connection slipping, that's when my brain starts going crazy thinking of all the money I spent on this doll/character, and the anxiety goes from my usual (which is bad enough) into overdrive and it sucks. lol. I do have some mental issues (I won't go into that here) but they sure don't help.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? In a way? I grew up poor, and often heard my parents fighting about money... while also maxing the credit cards for random crap. So now, even as an old lady, I still feel guilty any time I spend money on something that's not a necessity unless I keep it forever. So any time I get too many dolls, or it feels I've bought too much in a short span, etc. then I have to basically talk myself into not being guilty both with buying and selling.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? No, not at all.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? Again, not at all.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? Yeah. Like I said, I have other mental issues, and sometimes they like to play havoc with my brain.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? Nope. My boyfriend doesn't care, he's a gamer so he gets it to some extent. My few friends are either also in the hobby or just don't care anyway. And anyone else? Why would I care what they think? It's my money, not theirs.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?
Buying: When I have a chunk of money and get shop-happy or need/want "retail therapy", am in a depressed cycle, or just have too many ideas and can't seem to focus on just one at a time.
Downsizing: When I've lost the bond with a character. I don't sell much at all anymore, but when I was sick I also sold a lot because I needed the money. That's really about the most I've ever downsized at one time.

 

I felt I made too many bad decisions and bought too many. There is nothing wrong with them. I just had major buyer remorse.
I am trying to downsize

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? I'm hoping for no more than 12 and anything past that is size related.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? Fears of moving again and currently no climate control. (Space Limits.)

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? Not past, the future.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? No. Just space limits and the future.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? No. Just the future.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? No. You can't stop the future.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? Not yet. They're in storage most of the time.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? Impulse?? I honestly still don't know what I like. Most are still faceless and without clothes. The trigger of downsizing IS the question of dedication and if I like my dolls. (AND, I know I have to move one day.)

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? I never set myself any particular limit, but I am running out of display space. I think that's my biggest limitation- if I can't display the doll out in the open, I don't want to get another one. Doesn't particularly depend on size, considering I favor 1/3.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? I feel sad that they're neglected. Logically I know that they're dolls, they don't have human feelings or emotions. But seeing them all out on display and knowing some of them haven't been handled in over a month or haven't had their outfit changed in a year+ makes me feel bad.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? Since most of my anxiety is related to the nonsensical feeling that they're lonely or neglected, well...

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? I'm very careful about avoiding clutter. I spend my day off every week tidying up my room to make sure there's no clutter/everything is in its correct place. I absolutely cannot stand clutter or mess/chaos.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? Not particularly, although I get overwhelmed by how many shoes and stands they all need. I still need about 10 SD-size stands and 6 MSD-size stands to have my full collection standing up. I now force myself to order a stand with each new doll I get (barring clickwars- I did not order one with my DDdy Sasara 20th Anni because I was worried that I wouldn't check out on time if I added anything else, lol.)

Does this anxiety come in cycles? In a way- when I'm too busy with work and/or going through personal issues where I rarely feel like leaving my bed, I feel more and more that my dolls are neglected. I used to grab one doll and put them in a wrapping blanket to have next to me, but in more recent times I constantly feel too "unclean" to handle my dolls- an entirely different issue in and of itself.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? Most of the time I can ignore it, but yes. I actually have multiple identical sculpts- three SD-F-60s (all 3 with FCS GM-01, for that matter), three SDM-F-60s (also all with the same makeup), two DDH-03s, and two DDH-24s. On top of that, the vast majority of my collection is Volks- as a Volks fan myself I can easily distinguish the sculpts, but there's no denying they can suffer from same-face syndrome to someone unfamiliar with the hobby (or even within the hobby, tbh) I think my biggest worry as I get older (as ridiculous and somewhat backwards as it is) is that I'd never be able to find an S/O who understands.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? I actually have not downsized yet- I don't have any specific plans to. I do go through periods of time where I think about selling the majority of my collection, but I can't bear to part with any of them. I actually sold a Dollfie Dream a few years ago and still regret it a bit to this day. I thought about re-purchasing the same doll, but to me it wouldn't be the same, because it wouldn't be the same doll I'd had before. Some flavor of attachment issues, lol. I'm at 34 dolls currently- 7 of them are 1/4 scale, 2 are 1/6, and the rest are all 1/3.

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
I am limitless. I have more than sixty BJDs. My pictures and stories are where I use them the most. I have a lot of dolls, and the BJDs don't worry me, but occasionally I wish I had fewer dolls overall and had focused more on the BJDs from the start of my doll collecting. I do occasionally feel overwhelmed by my extensive doll collection, which is close to 500 dolls in total.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
I believe that having fewer BJDs would increase my anxiety and make me question why I bothered. I purchased the dolls because I wanted to take pictures of them and use them to tell stories. If I had fewer, I would be concerned that I wouldn't have enough characters to tell my tale.

Before, I was constantly concerned that I wouldn't have enough characters to fill my parts when I initially started collecting. Where would I purchase my next doll? What would I get in order to play the character? Now that I have the primary cast, I don't feel as anxious about finding one or two dolls to add a new character as I did when creating the complete ensemble.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?
This, I believe, is the reason I won't get rid of the non-BJDs that simply perch atop my bunk bed. Every time we moved, my parents would also discard a lot of my belongings. I was never allowed to decide what to keep for myself. My room might feel more liberated if I didn't have so many porcelain and fashion dolls, however...

When I was younger, I had a kitten and many dolls and stuffed animals. My parents said I could keep the kitten as long as I got rid of the dolls and stuffed animals. Without giving me the option to decide which of my toys to part with, my mother simply gave them away at random. Can you imagine how horrified I was to discover some of them torn and in my friends' garbage cans a few days later? In addition, the following day, my parents gave the kitten away.

I suppose I believe that no one will cherish, adore, and care for them the way I do. What happens if they wind up in someone's garbage? I'm afraid of what would happen to my dolls if I weren't around to look after them, so I don't want to part with them.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?
I make an effort to keep things tidy and organized. With the exception of the dolls on top of my bunk bed, which are even arranged and peering over the bed, all of my dolls are on shelves. I attempt to at least arrange the items that remain outside and store a lot of the doll props in a big toy chest or boxes that slip under my bed. My BJDs have doll clothes trunks and their own dresser.

I turn off the lights and cameras after photo shoots are finished. I've moved them aside. I put away all the props and stack the unused furniture. Everything I used is reorganized. Organization is my friend

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?
I don't give this much thought. I recycle as much as I can. Every doll box is kept in storage. Building things out of shipping boxes is something my kid enjoys doing. I don't think the BJD's will wind up in any kind of landfill. They are valuable objects.

Does this anxiety come in cycles?
I usually buy when I'm feeling more nervous, but I don't sell my dolls. I also get nervous when my room starts to feel cluttered since I need to put things away after using them.

In order to place my dolls on a book shelf, I recently cleared it out. I put the books in a box to donate to charity because they weren't part of a series or anything I would read again. My stress was reduced just by organizing more and having the doll shelf.

Moving is something we are debating. I'm concerned that if we move, I want the BJDs in a bin in the vehicle with me. My mother wants the dolls in a moving truck. I've heard terrifying tales of dolls disappearing from moving trucks, so I'll argue and prevail on this one. The BJDs will not be placed in a moving truck, but the boxes can go into a moving truck.

Do you feel judged by the people around you?
I've previously experienced grief over them. However, I'm okay with people dismissing me as the weird doll person these days. My family teases me merrily about how much money I spend on dolls, but I can tease them back because they all have their own interests and events.

Indeed, it took some time to reach the point of acceptance, particularly with my mother. However, she now gets enthusiastic about what I am creating for them or what doll I will acquire next. When my mother tried to argue that I was "too old for dolls," I used to point out that my grandmother was also a passionate doll collector.

To anyone who feels that friends and relatives are judging them. Please don't let this affect you. Eventually, they will come to terms with it. At first, it may be unwillingly. If a passion causes someone to leave your life, it's likely that they weren't worth having in the first place.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?

I simply can't get rid of my BJDs.

A few (off topic-reborn) dolls have been handed away by me. Usually, it's because someone talked about how much they loved the doll and I knew they would value it more than I did. Before I started BJDs, I used to make and collect them. The house is filled with toddler dolls, so if someone comes over and is excited about one of my less favorite toddlers, it's theirs.

 

@RabbidBunnies I don't forgive your parents for giving away your kitten. They broke their promise. I would fight your mother on this possible upcoming move - dolls in the car, mom in the moving truck.

Sorry, I own two cats. Avid cat lover and doll owner. Your childhood story made me mad. All the internet hugs for you fellow collector!

 

This topic is made for me.
I think I've talked about this quite a bit previously on the forums, but seeing this topic came at a good time since I've been getting into impulse purchases again.

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
My limit is one. Any more than that and my anxiety spirals out of control in record time.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
I used to live with the constant pressure that I would have to move any moment because my home life was very turbulent. Even though it has calmed down considerably, I still have those fears and don't like to have more than I can quickly carry if need be. I think there's an aspect of being self conscious over owning too much as well.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?
In addition to the previous answer, our storage unit was robbed when I was a kid and that rooted a deep fear of losing what I care for in me. Things that were irreplaceable were taken and probably trashed once the thieves realized they hadn't gotten super valuable goods to resell. That made me not want to be sentimental or I feel anxiety when I start to save too many things.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?
I don't really struggle with clutter and I lean toward minimalism instead of maximalism. I just don't enjoy seeing a space filled with too much stuff.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?
I think if I were to own tens of dolls I'd feel guilty for the impact on the environment that they and their accessories have, despite so much of what I buy being artist pieces.

Does this anxiety come in cycles?
Oh yeah. When I'm stressed, I tend to buy more and end up reselling it.

Do you feel judged by the people around you?
Not when it comes to my doll. It's clear he's important to me and special because of his unique one-of-a-kind status. I've had this hobby for such a long time that family doesn't really make comments about it anymore.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?
Stress is a huge one for me. When I feel life is out of control, I tend to think with my wallet instead of my brain. I get a huge boost of serotonin from waiting for something to come in the mail, only to not really feel much when it finally arrives. These are the purchases that are first to go because I'm not attached to them or I feel guilty for spending that money so frivolously.

 

I have a large collection of bjd and other dolls, when I’m overwhelmed it is because I worry about my family having to deal with them when I’m gone.

 

This is me, except I have no one to deal with my things. If I'm lucky enough to know when my time is coming, I plan on donating or giving away a good portion. Some I think I will try to find the right buyer. Selfishly there are a few dolls that I can't bear the thought of selling or giving away.

For those I've slipped detailed information about them into their boxes. Stuff like receipts, printed photo references, (in case the doll is not in the box) a typed up sheet of where and how much I purchased the doll for. If I bought extra parts for that specific doll I've also included that information as well as detailed body measurements. Hopefully it'll be helpful.

For everyone else (and for those that I no longer have the boxes for) I have that same information printed off and put together in a binder/folder I've made that I keep with my doll things.

Having all of this stuff is really nice to have on hand too! It's convenient to easily check my notes and see if an outfit will fit someone for example. Or where I've bought a part, etc.

Since this post is long, my answers to the OP are in the spoiler.

Spoiler

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
My heart says no! But I've always lived in tiny apartments so I try to keep my purchases limited to 1/6 size and below.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
The only thing I really worry about is covered above.

Do you feel judged by the people around you?
I probably am but it doesn't bother me.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?
It's always FOMO. If I see a good deal I have to resist the urge to buy.

I'm not yet at the point for (major) downsizing, but I have thought about donating/selling before and will likely do that when the clutter/collection becomes too much to manage and/or takes up too much space.

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
Part of my problem is that I never really set a limit. I currently have 27 (but just decided to try to sell a couple) and I feel like it's too much. Seeing the number stresses me out. It's hard to say whether size is a factor, I have quite a few tinies and it makes me feel like my collection is smaller than it is, when I look around my room I mostly notice the big ones... but like I said, just seeing the number 27 stresses me out, and it doesn't matter what size they are! So I think ideally I want to set a limit regardless of size. But I think I'd be more lenient with small ones...

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
Well, like some others in this thread, I have an anxiety disorder(s) already. I'm also a collector, I always have been, starting with stuffed animals and dolls as a kid. I still have multiple collections (mainly BJD, and plushies, but I have smaller collections of anime figures, Breyer horses, My Little Ponies, Calico Critters, other dolls (Takara Jenny and Madame Alexander), blind box figures/keychains.... yeah) and one source of anxiety is definitely the overall amount of stuff I have. And I have pared it down a LOT from how it was some years ago. But I only recently got into a mindset where I feel like I really am able to be mindful and picky about what I buy. I'm so happy about that, but knowing that I haven't always been that way and now have lots of stuff that I don't necessarily love/wouldn't buy now if I saw it for sale (even if I'm fond of it) fills me with anxiety. I'm also very stringent about cleanliness and neatness in my home, clutter and dirt is so detrimental to my mental health, and the more stuff I have, the harder it is to keep it neat looking and clean/dust everything. Annnnd there is the anxiety on top of everything about how to go about getting rid of stuff once I decide to do so. For instance, I have many bins of clothes in my garage I intend to take to resale and donation shops -- they've been there for months. But it's like out of sight, out of mind, and executive dysfunction, I just can't seem to get myself out to the stores. With BJD it's like a) the stress of selling online -- I never got the hang of it or figured out how to properly determine a shipping price (so I usually include shipping in the price and lose out on it) and b) the market is terrible and has been for years (at least from my perspective). Aside from the most sought after dolls, it's hard to sell anything period, and if you do, you take a huge loss. Part of me wants a bunch of my dolls out of my house but I don't think anyone will even buy them, and if they do I have to deal with the shipping. IT'S A LOTTT

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?
I'm not sure about this one. Luckily I never experienced anything traumatic related to my collections, even as a child. I think it is more related to my anxiety and other conditions (ADHD = impulse shopping and wanting lots of stuff, vs OCD and anxiety = struggling with contamination, overstimulation, and clutter issues).

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?
YESSS but I think I addressed this all too well in one of the earlier questions LOL

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?
Yes actually. I wouldn't say that's the primary driver but it is a big factor. I am someone who cares a lot about the environment and sustainability, as well as "doing the right thing" (maybe a neurodivergence related issue IDK. But I can get very fixated on being morally good/correct). In the past few years I've become increasingly concerned about overconsumption, and that's one of the factors that has influenced my shift to being more picky about my purchases. That and learning to recognize quality (and recognize how poor the quality of most current mass-produced things is), plus concerns about the ethics of manufacturing (unpaid/underpaid labor, poor working conditions, etc.) But yes... it's a factor. I am a bit less concerned when it comes to BJDs vs. say my blind boxes, because BJDs are designed to last and are harder to overconsume given their price point (it's difficult to buy a lot of BJDs at a time, for example, and I think we tend to be more invested in making them last and mindfully rehoming them because of how expensive and often sentimental they are). That being said, there are still lots and lots of BJDs being manufactured, not to mention clothes and accessories, and resin is a type of plastic... as we know, not great for the environment in the end.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? I think it does, but it's a bit hard to tell. I think a lot of time it's a subconscious thing so I don't identify that something is triggering this anxiety, but it's very possible something is. A few things I noticed influence it are money -- probably obvious and common. When I'm low on funds/not feeling financially secure, and/or when there is something expensive I really want, that commonly triggers me to consider selling dolls (and consequently getting anxious about it).

Do you feel judged by the people around you?
Luckily, not at all! My family has always been supportive, my mom even has a couple BJDs of her own and she attends conventions with me. My partner has no problem with it (he doesn't even mind that my dolls stare at us from the shelves while we're sleeping ) and has his own expensive hobbies, so he gets it.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away?
These days, I buy most of my dolls at conventions. I don't keep up with releases much at all, especially because I stopped using Instagram and Facebook. I mostly interact with my local BJD community (this is the first time in a while I've replied to a thread on here!) There is also that instant gratification of buying a doll in person, and the ability to handle it before you buy. Anyway, I think there are things about this that are good -- for example, I buy mostly secondhand dolls (good on the sustainability front) and I have less risk of ordering a doll I end up disliking in person, since I've seen and handled it. BUT... it's usually an impulse purchase, made because I just looove the doll. And here's the thing: sometimes it's wildly successful. I have a couple of impulse purchase dolls that I love dearly. But sometimes, not so much. I would like to curb this, and I think I will have an easier time now because my mindset around buying stuff has really shifted. I'm sure I won't be perfect though.

What are the triggers behind downsizing?
I think this is another one I addressed a bit in previous questions, but mainly 1) space/reducing clutter, 2) wanting to have fewer but more "special" dolls, and 3) money. I didn't go into the "special dolls" thing yet so I'll elaborate on that one. I have this desire to have just a few dolls that are really special, like grails, and no more. I'm not really sure why but I think I've seen others express this before too. Something about having a really small collection that you can focus on, build up a wardrobe for, etc. is really appealing. I also think aesthetically it looks nice to have a few dolls on the shelf along with other stuff (books, trinkets, whatever). Especially if the dolls have a cohesive aesthetic (I don't even have a cohesive aesthetic myself, I love too many different fashion styles, and so do my dolls...lol). But at the same time, I'm very attached to a lot of my dolls -- more than the 2-3 I imagine as an ideal dream collection. I don't realistically think I will reduce my collection that much, but I do intend to make it quite a bit smaller than it is now.

Well, if you read this far, thanks for reading, I kind of went stream of consciousness on this. It was a bit of a therapeutic exercise for me actually. Thank you for this thread, this is a really cool discussion topic.

 

This thread is really interesting!

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size? Different things overwhelm me with different sizes, I think. I have a huge fashion doll collection, a big chunk of which is displayed -- it's the dolls that I don't have room to display currently, sitting in bags in my closet, that overwhelm me. With BJDs, the thing that overwhelms me is planning for all the accessories needed to display them completely. Having multiple dolls that require wigs, eyes, faceups, clothes, shoes, etc. can start to overwhelm me with regards to planning a budget. I feel paralyzed almost with what to get or make first. In addition, of course I also always want more BJDs! But then I feel like I'm neglecting the ones I do have and not getting any closer to fully displaying them.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious? For me its mostly about calculating the money needed to complete each doll - I got bills to pay!

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past? Ah, well, I definitely have a complicated relationship with money, as I'm sure most of us do. It was something my mom was always anxious about (did not matter if that anxiety was based in any reality, which it often wasn't). My family also looked down on a lot of my hobbies as being useless. I still remember some really unkind things my older sister said to me when she caught me looking through an American Girl catalogue. They don't know about my BJD collection because I'm no longer in touch with them (long story...) Collecting as an adult was a way for me to heal from a lot of this. So, even though it doesn't motivate me to sell them, I still go through waves of shame about myself and my interested sometimes. (Therapy helps lol)

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter? I have always been a collector, I live in a small place, and I struggle with chores and stuff for mental health reasons. I wish I had more space to aesthetically display my dolls and other collections (books, tarot cards, figures, stickers, etc...), but one day I will! For now, my clutter isn't enough to ruin my day or make me unable to relax in my home, so overall it isn't a big driver in purging.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness? I think about the eco impact of this hobby and materialism in general, of course. Dolls are made of plastic, which is overall a huge problem for the environment. That being said, BJDs are hardly sing-use disposable plastics, which I feel is a larger issue than artist goods. Sometimes I fantasize about plastic alternatives that are friendlier to the environment, but I don't think we have such an alternative to resin yet.

Does this anxiety come in cycles? Sure, of course! I am stressed more about money when unexpected things happen (vet visits, car repairs, and the like). When I'm stressed about other things, such as work, it can also manifest as money stress, even if that's not the underlying cause of the stress. I think it's important to try to be mindful of our emotions around money.

Do you feel judged by the people around you? I expected this and was very shy about sharing my collection with friends for a while, but honestly everyone in my life who I've shared with thinks its cool and is supportive! Definitely not what I expected given my family's reaction to all of my hobbies, lol. My husband calls me out when I am wanting to buy a doll very similar to one I already have, which I actually appreciate and we usually laugh about.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing? This is such a good question, I honestly wish I knew! I'm getting better about impulse purchases overall, my mantra is, "There will always be another opportunity to get a specific doll, often for a better price." In the past, the biggest offenders are dolls that I thought were pretty, but were not on my wishlist. These ones often end up getting sold, but sometimes a doll is on my wishlist, but once in my hands, I lose motivation to work on it. I guess this would be called "not bonding." A big motivator for downsizing is wanting to get other dolls!

 

I do have a fear of collecting too many dolls since I don't like my spaces to be cluttered or overfilled.Maybe when I get a larger space I will be less inclined to worry about storage.

 

Yes, I do feel guilty of having too many dolls and the money I’ve spent on them. My dolls got me through a difficult time in my life (I will admit to going overboard) and now that my life is much better, the guilt has really crept in. I’m going to keep the ones I have and enjoy them to the fullest, without buying any more. I have enough to keep me busy for a long time!

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
My limit is determined by physical space and how much mental real estate I have for doll projects: it's not a set number.
Size has no effect: I mostly have 55-75cm dolls with some 1/4 and 1/6 child dolls. The size of 1/3+ dolls gives them a presence and appeal to me that smaller dolls/figurines lack.
I used to collect figures (Figma, Nendoroid, Play Arts Kai, etc.) but I never did anything with them and sold them when I got into BJDs. Sure, I could fit a lot more 1/6 dolls than 1/3s in my space, but I don't enjoy crafting for small scales and the size doesn't appeal to me.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
I got back into BJDs with the idea of shelling characters from my writing. I learned the hard way that a well-developed character won't often fit into a doll shell: no matter how I styled the dolls, I couldn't translate the ideal version of the character in my head to physical doll form.
Sunk cost fallacy got me: I'd spent so much time and money on the dolls and accessories that I felt obligated to make them work as those characters, even as I was losing interest in the project.
I don't try to shell well-defined characters any more: I buy dolls with a concept in mind, but it needs to be a negotiation between my ideas and how the physical doll shell.
Instead of buying a doll with the mindset of "you're going to be Character A the sculptor, who wears boho fashion with chunky necklaces and has blonde hair in a bob cut. Character A is a bit of a slob, and lives with her artist father, and they get a lot of commissions from a crime boss", it's more "you could be a somewhat slovenly artist whose patrons aren't paying her with clean money".
I need the flexibility to adjust the character according to the physical doll: what if the doll looks terrible in the character's haircut or outfit? What if the character's accessories aren't available in the doll's size? What if the doll's face or body suggest different traits to the character's personality?
Character A might end up being a painter with long brown hair who wears fitted monochrome clothes and is very formal around clients but messy when she's working on her art.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?
Perhaps friends/family not showing interest in my hobbies has led me to not share things with people outside of hobby communities, but I think it's more not wanting to explain the difference between a BJD and Barbie, or why I enjoy using a DSLR more than a phone camera. I just prefer to discuss the things I like with like-minded people.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?
No – there is clutter in my living space that's been accrued over years of my family living there, but clearing it isn't something I can do alone as the items aren't mine.
Ideally, I would like to buy a customised storage system for BJDs and their extra items, as most standard cabinets aren't made to accommodate 1/3+ dolls.

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?
Not at all – I used to work in manufacturing, and the factory would produce more waste in one eight-hour shift than my household would produce in a month. I reuse packaging that's still in good condition, but I'm not beholden to keeping bashed-up boxes or flaking pleather doll shoes out of a sense of eco-guilt: that's how you get into a hoarding situation.
BJDs are high quality made-to-order items that are designed to last, unlike fast fashion clothing or planned obsolescence electronics, so I feel no eco-guilt over buying them.

Does this anxiety come in cycles?
During recent difficult periods of my life I've been tempted to engage in "retail therapy", but what's stopped me is that anything I buy will forever be attached to the memory of the event: I don't want a doll that will always remind me of a family member's illness.
Difficult periods also make me re-evaluate my capacity for doll projects and my financial situation: do I have the energy to work on this doll in the near future? Given the circumstances, would I rather have this doll or money right now?

Do you feel judged by the people around you?
Yes – BJDs aren't a "conventional" hobby, and I prefer not to show or talk about my dolls with non-hobbyists. On the odd occasion I have, the usual range of responses is:

• "That's interesting, I guess, but I don't understand why you like them so much"
• "So creepy! How can you sleep with Annabelle/Chucky staring at you?"
• "You should sell the dolls so you can buy/invest in (x item)"

I keep my dolls in my personal space so other people don't have to look at them.
I avoid mentioning the price other than in vague terms like "art doll", "made to order" and "expensive".
People whose only references for dolls are kids' toys tend to get sticker shock, which spurs on the "sell the dolls" type comments.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?
It's taken me a few years to work out what my make-or-break criteria for dolls are. Now I can flick the "oooh shiny new doll!" devil off my shoulder when it rears its head.
Having set criteria helps avoid impulse buys and the vicious cycle of enjoying the pictures/idea of a new doll, getting it and not liking it as much as I'd thought, and selling it at a loss.

Reasons I've sold dolls are:

• I bought the doll with the intention of shelling a specific character but it didn't work out (see above)
• I couldn't tolerate the body: not able to stand unassisted, odd posture, out of scale with the others, etc.
• The head looked "off" next to my other dolls: different scale, style, eye size, etc.
• I liked the doll in sales/owner photos but not in person
• I wanted another doll more than the one I owned and sold it to fund a new purchase

I don't consider myself a "revolving door collector" and I don't buy dolls with the intention of selling them, but I feel you have to handle a lot of BJDs to work out what you like and what you don't, and there's bound to be a few missteps along the way. The dolls I've owned and let go have taught me about my own preferences, and I'm grateful to them for that.
It's important for my mental health as a human not to feel beholden to inanimate objects: what gives a doll "character" or "life" is how I feel about and interact with it.
Like how not every writing idea will become a finished narrative, not every doll concept will become a doll. I've made my peace with this and learned when it's time to move a doll on: better to sell it than waste time and effort on something I'm not enjoying, when I could be having fun with the dolls I do enjoy.

 

x

 

What is your limit? Does it depend on the size?
I don't have a real limit, but naturally it's easier to add on a few RealPukis than to get a large doll. I'm running out of room for MSD and SD sized dolls, to be honest.
I currently have over 100 dolls. I think it's 114, but I could be off by one or two.

What are the reasons deep down why you feel anxious?
I feel I spent a lot of money on every doll and I feel guilty about neglecting them for long periods at a time. I have so many dolls now that need to be finished.
I guess some of the guilt has to do with the money I'm spending on hobby-related items while I still have so much sitting around. Not just dolls.
I think I have enough projects to last me several lifetimes, and it's a bit ridiculous.

Is your anxiety triggered by something that happened in the past?
I think part of it is my mother's compulsion to clean and tidy my room for me - by getting rid of stuff *she* figured I no longer needed or wanted - without asking. Like old/faded/damaged stuffed toys or broken pottery that I kept around because I loved it and wanted to 'fix' it. My mother was strictly a "throw it out and replace it" sort of person.
And then there's my dad's habit of taking back gifts and saying "everything in the house belongs to me because it was bought with my money" - which not only wasn't true (I did get gifts from other people, too), but also goes against the definition of the word "gift", IMHO.
Anyway, this is something I've had 40+ years to get over, but apparently deep down inside I can't. I have a really bad tendency to hoard. They're all mine. My own. My preciousssssss....

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your general struggle with clutter?
See above. I have lots of dolls, yarn, dollhouse kits and accessories, knitting and crochet supplies, fabric, books... My dolls are all fairly well displayed, at least they're all on stands and mostly behind glass (except the SDs). But they're not all visible, some are way to the back of the cabinet...

Does this anxiety have anything to do with your sense of sustainability/eco-friendliness?
No.

Does this anxiety come in cycles?
Every so often when I look at DoA MP and see a doll I would like, I get assaulted by guilt about the unfinished dolls I still have. Just contemplating taking on another project when I have so much left to do...
Lately the anxiety *has* been helping me to stop buying.

Do you feel judged by the people around you?
Not really. I am really past caring about what other people think about the way I live my life.

What are your main triggers behind the impulse purchases that end up being then the first to go/be sold away? What are the triggers behind downsizing?
I can't downsize. I get anxious at the idea of selling anything.