Tips on Organizing a Meetup?

Kudos to you for helping get a meet-up group started! Some things that have really helped our group locally flourish are below... just some ideas!

We have an awesome person who organized a Discord group for us. This let's us have a group chat about our meets so everyone can feel involved and throw out suggestions for planning. It also helps people break the ice virtually and chat with folks before coming to a meet... which has helped with some of our members who might be anxious about not knowing anyone at the meet.

2nd suggestion is to be mindful of the places you choose to host meets. I know the idea of a cute cafe sounds perfect for a doll meet, but ask yourself if its large enough to accommodate your group, when are its peak busy times that you might have trouble finding tables and space, and lastly is everyone comfortable enough to meet in a public setting?

I've gone to meets before where the location was so small and crowded, I felt super uncomfortable taking up tables and seats from the Cafe owners knowing we were going to take away patron space for 1-2 hrs. during their busy business hours. Sometimes the business owners are not shy about letting you know they're irritated by it too... which put me off to public meetups for a while before our current group started.

Some ideas for venue spaces that are accomodating:

One of our members was super awesome and suggested to look into our local public libraries for meeting rooms. They will rent them out for super cheap and it's a nice quiet closed door setting that people can hangout and set up dolls in peace.

Cafes and restaurant spaces can work too, but like I said, just be mindful of how large the space actually is (Maybe visit before you go) and for extra measure you can even call ahead and check with the business owners to be courteous. Some places have private areas they might let you use if everyone is going to buy something.

As far as the meet goes, I've always enjoyed a laid back approach so everyone can assimilate into the social group at their own pace. We have a mixture of introverts and extroverts in our group and I think it helps to remember that some people just want to come and observe and others are more comfortable socializing etc.

We dont really have "rules" in our group... codes of conduct might scare some people lol. The one time we did have an issue with someone in the group, the admin of our Discord gave a very diplomatic warning to the person, and later ended up removing them from the Discord group because of their conduct.
It sucks when that happens, but I was grateful to our admin that he was proactive enough to handle the issue and didn't let the drama build up.

Lastly, we've done Secret Santa swaps in our group and organized it through the Discord which worked just fine.

Hope these ideas help you!

 

So, this is just my personal opinion, but I enjoy it when meetups have "themes" of a sort. Now, it doesn't have to be a "You need to dress your doll up as (theme)" sort of thing, but an open interpretation of it. Like "New Doll" as a theme and someone could try out a new wig, or outfit, or bring in a new Doll they just received. Or like a "summer" theme in the summer, just something fun that you could take any way you want to. I enjoy it when everything is a pretty open forum, back when I led the meetups at Fabric Friends and Dolls we had the theme and we kind of went around and talked about whatever we brought for that theme a bit, but otherwise, it was an open hang out where everyone kind of mingled.

As far as the location, some ideas seem amazing, but logistics can be a nightmare. For example, parks can be amazing for photoshoot-centered meetups but may lack proper shade/areas to not only protect the dolls from light/heat but also protect the humans attending from the elements as well. I personally like open/empty rooms dedicated towards the meetup itself, like renting a room at the library/a hall but that probably has to deal with my own agoraphobia more so than logistics.

As far as feeling comfortable, that is a bit dependent on the person. I enjoy a more laid-back approach, usually a "leader" kind of opening things up, introducing themselves, and then maybe asking those who are comfortable to say something about themselves or their dolls. Not everyone likes to speak in public/without being comfortable but I find that sort of scenario a good way to "get to know" people without actually having to step outside of the comfort zone socially. With the group I was in prior to moving we would talk about what we wanted to do at the next meet during the meet we were at. Most of the time it was just talking about a theme, but there were times we did restringing/maintenance and also did "Face up tips".

In the last meetups that I attended, there were rules, but those rules were there because we met up in the Fabric Friends and Dolls store, which has its own reputation to protect. I think beyond a "Be courteous/respectful of everyone" there shouldn't be a need for rules (unless the place you are using has their own rules).

As far as swaps/contests/etc, I think that is something one needs to sit down and speak with the group about. Something where you get everyone's opinions on what should be the limits/regulations when it comes to such a thing. We ran swaps, contests, etc but it required a bit of everyone participating/those who wanted to participate to come to an agreement on the terms.

 

It's great that you are motivated to cultivate a meetup community in your area! I have spearheaded something like that before so I'll tell you my own opinion on some stuff. I would bear in mind that fledgling communities and small meets are very different from huge established meets, and there are a lot of good things about it.
First off, your community will probably benefit most from a perspective of inclusivity and giving opportunity to members to easily connect with each other and the event host(s) outside of meets. A discord community or meetup thread where people can network and voice suggestions and concerns should do the trick. Discord servers will have the bonus of letting more newbies/casuals connect because they do not have membership here, which means you may have to be a bit more cautious but in early days with small member base I think it's not too troublesome.
Encourage people to let a friend come along especially while groups are small, no doll ownership required.
Always emphasize accessibility. There are many people who will benefit from some accomodation and it will foster a close knit community. Accessibility looks like considering transportation and cost of getting into whatever venue, physical accessibility like is it wheelchair friendly, light/sound levels, temperature, allergens, etc etc. Try not to feel overwhlemed by it. Making an effort and communicating honestly about venues as well as listening when someone says something is not accessible for them will help your community.
This is already long winded I'm sorry.
I think low key meets are a great way to start. A picnic or someone's house or a library. If possible people can bring their own snacks and the host could provide a couple diverse options. Small things like having free water bottles could really make people feel like you care!
I can understand why established groups would like a theme, but I think it's totally unnecessary at first. In my experience you just want to get a few people there however possible and as the host make sure nobody is totally left out at the event. And it will build from there.
Some people like and need more structure and others don't. People will naturally pair off so, anticipate that. You could bring or encourage others to bring simple games to play if they are worried about needing an activity.
Oh and there was a box at our early meets filled with free stuff provided at first by me (it was not putting me out to do this at all. It was things I didn't want anymore and was too tired to try to sell.) And the free stuff box was pretty well embraced, others began to bring lots of things and I found this was a good mentality because it was a "give without expectations" situation. Everyone seemed to really benefit.

Good luck I hope you have a great success!

 

I’ve helped plan some of my local group’s meetups! There used to be multiple meetup groups in the area, but they fizzled out either over the years or in 2020. A few of us connected again on here at the end of 2021 and someone made a Discord server, which has grown to 40 members over the last year & a half! We have a short set of rules that we stick to- legits only, keep things SFW, you can post about other dolls, & be respectful- and I don’t think there have been any issues thus far, as the people in the group are pretty chill. Discord is awesome since it allows people to chat and get to know each other online before making the jump to meeting in person, plus it gives people who don’t want to/can’t attend meets in person a way to stay in touch.

As someone mentioned above, accessibility is a big thing to keep in mind. One of the things the group I’m in is trying to figure out is how to keep things fair for everyone. We’re based in the DMV area (DC/MD/VA) and we often find that meetup locations that are accessible via public transit are often difficult to access by car, and vice versa. We’ve found a library that lets us meet there for free that’s accessible via both, so going forward we’ll be holding meetups there every other month, and the months between will be at other locations that are more scenic/have other things to do/etc. We also hold votes to determine which days we’ll meet, and while we do have a couple of us who volunteered to take the lead on coordinating events, we encourage members to coordinate meets on other days as well if they want to. So far it seems like things are working out well, but it’s an ever-evolving thing.

We can’t do swaps/sales at a lot of our meets since some of our locations don’t allow that (libraries, county parks), so I have not been to one where that occurred & can’t speak to that, but definitely make sure your venue allows it if you do!

 

Hey! Good luck! I hope organizing the meet works out well for you

Before I get into the numbered questions, I saw your bit about doing it right. That's good! Strive for doing it right. You'll also probably end up with some degree of egg on your face at some point, but if you care then the amount of the proverbial egg will be a lot less than if you just don't care because you'll be putting in the real work. Don't be afraid to get a little egg on your face from time to time.

I have experience organizing meets and attending meets others organized, so I can answer from both points of view.

1. I like a good variety of dolls and people. I also like a willingness by people to engage with the meet. It is good when people share their experience and answer questions. It is also good when questions are welcomed. Sometimes you get people that are shy. Try to be welcoming to them. Let them know there's a spot for them. That being said, it's ultimately on them to participate.

2. This has been a problem more for fringe one-off meets, usually as extras to conventions or whatever, but one thing that could've really been improved at some meets in the past for me is the organizer not even bothering to show up and not even to make some kind of post about how they're not coming. Even when I could see that they were online and my messages to them were being read and all that. Respect the time of the people that came to your meet. Yes, life gets in the way sometimes, but outright blowing off people is wrong. You have a responsibility to those people. You might be the only other person that this person sees. They might have come from hours away just to go to your meet. Don't let them sit at some table alone miles away from home feeling like Sally after waiting for The Great Pumpkin. Yeah, it might just be you and one other person, but it's way better than nobody at all. Also, if life getting in the way becomes a pattern, rethink your approach to things.

3. I've never gotten a bad vibe at meets. I've heard stories of other meets elsewhere in the world having bad vibes, but I've had good luck. The closest thing I had to that was one person who I found was slandering people at an old local meet and even slandered me before they ever met me. They were posting about it on some other website. I never met this person, and it's been over 10 years.

4. Most meets I go to are totally laid back. Set up dolls, talk, do whatever. I like taking photos. I think someone should be a designated picture taker if nobody just does it on their own. It's good to share photos of meets for everyone to see later. It can also be a good promotional piece to get people interested in your meet. Sometimes there would be a meet with a special workshop like restringing or sueding, and that's a good thing for people. If you've got a monthly meet, maybe do a restringing day a couple times a year or something like that. Of course, if someone brings a doll to a regular meet and needs help restringing, someone can help even if it's not a special meet.

5. Things have been largely been fine with rules and conduct. One thing I've worried about is DoA's rules about meets and how nobody can be barred from a meet if it's posted on DoA. This could be old information. Things may have changed since I looked at it years ago. Not that I've had the need to kick anyone out or anything like that, but the rule would probably keep me from posting about a meet here on DoA if there was a problem person. Of course, it would limit the reach of promoting the meet and attracting new people and whatnot.

6. I've been to meets where sales and things like that have been allowed though it would have to be kept quiet. It depends on the location and what their rules are. For my own meets at a public library, I've never officially allowed it, but people did a good job of keeping it quiet. I even bought a couple things from people at my meets.

A couple additional thoughts:

It's great to organize a meet. It can be great for the people that come to the meet. It can also be a great booster of your own self esteem. However, you can't force anyone to come to your meet. People are going to have a changed work schedule, have kids and have less free time, be flaky, lose interest in the hobby, have a bout of depression, or possibly even pass away. If you find that your meet is not getting enough people to come out over an extended period of time then you might have to make the difficult decision to stop organizing the meet or at least rethink certain aspects of it. It can actually be heartbreaking for you, but it's a burden the organizer has to bear.

Another thing I saw mentioned in the topic is Discord. I don't use Discord, but I have a Facebook group that people can use to get news and discuss things. It is important to have a space like that, even if it's just the topic in the meetup section here on DoA, but I don't like the idea of having things be online so much. You're in the business of making a doll meet in meatspace, not creating another online community in cyberspace. If I wanted to talk online, I'd come here to DoA or whatever.

 

One meet up I went to was at a park that had several nooks so we could take over one and be on the alert if we saw any children coming. The other was at a community center. For locations I'd even be in to asking a local craft store about using their meet up room because most of the attendants would probably be customers.

My biggest worry is children around my dolls. I did a presentation once and said on the invitations that these were delicate collector dolls not toys and well behaved older children were allowed to attend. The one who did attend was a delight.

See if there is a more traditional doll club in your area and ask if BJDs can just come along. I took one to a recent show and it went great.