Lost in the mail - whose fault?

If available, the seller should ALWAYS get delivery confirmation. Tracking a package out of the country can get expensive, though. The USPS is always to blame when a package gets lost- I've had 2 packages sent to me, both with delivery confirmation, that have been lost forever by the post office. Knowing this, insurance should probably be purchased on a doll package just in case. Granted, you won't get the doll back, but you will get the monetary value for it.

 

Sellers should really insist on fully tracked and insured, if only for their own protection. I always do even though I probably lose sales because UK postage is probably one of the most expensive. I believe Paypal will always side with the buyer if a package doesn't arrive and there's no tracking. I'm not saying it IS the sellers fault if it does get lost, but personally I would not sell a doll without full cover - it's just asking for trouble.

 

Whenever I sell something, I insist on having the package fully tracked and insured also. I usually split the cost with the buyer so it's not so much on their end. And hey, this protection is every bit as much for my own piece of mind as for theirs. That's the way I see it. I just don't see how, without these steps, anyone can ever truly know it actually got shipped. And as for sellers who say in their ad that they refuse to take responsibility for a lost package...well, I just feel that's as good as putting "buyer beware" in big, bold letters on your ad. I'd simply never buy from someone who said it!

I actually experienced what you're talking about. I once purchased a couple of items on eBay (a wig and a pair of glass eyes from overseas) and all I received was an empty, torn, super-thin airmail envelope with a kleenex inside and no customs form attached! Needless to say, I was upset...but I politely notified the seller. Believe it or not, with such obviously inadequate packaging and no customs, she still refused to take responsibility. What she said exactly was, "Once I drop it in the mail box, I'm no longer responsible for what happens to it." I kid you not! This obviously willfully irresponsible behavior was quite upsetting to a responsible person like myself. Fortunately Paypal made it right and I got my money back...thank heavens. But if your seller has this mindset, you could very well be open to a big loss of cash, so my advice is just steer clear of sellers like this. There are plenty of them out there who take their responsibilities seriously and I'd much rather deal with them.

 

I am still waiting on my MP privileges to come into effect; in the meantime I have been hanging out in the marketplace subforums that are available to me now, including reading some of the feedback and "unresolved transactions" threads. Let me just say, that the majority of these situations regarding people who have no kept up their end of the deal DISGUST me.

To answer your questions:


So my questions, again, are:
• If there is no proof of having been shipped and you get nothing or it is broken, where is the blame placed?

Well, if there is no proof that the item was shipped (i.e no tracking number or any receipt of any kind), then the blame is on the SELLER. The customer can only say: "HEY! I wanna buy that! Here's money!" and then wait and wait and WAIT and hope the the seller does his/her part on getting that item to them safely. However, if it arrives broken, I believe that if it were MY item that I had made, I would give some sort of option to either replace it or get a refund. I'm sorry, but I think that's a chance you have to take as a seller. I used to work for a t-shirt company called David & Goliath Tees Inc. and I cannot tell you HOW MANY thousands of dollars worth of merchandise we had to resend to companies for FREE b/c they claimed they never received the merch, even though we had PROOF we sent out in P.O.s, tracking numbers, inspection receipts etc, and the company claimed they never received them. Its not fair, I know, and not all sellers can afford to do that, but if you want to put out a good name for yourself, you sometimes have to do those things to keep people happy. HOWEVER, I also believe that if a customer is treating you horribly and is repeatedly giving you a hard time even though you are doing your BEST to make them happy, you should make it CLEAR to them that you reserve the right to REFUSE to sell to them, and give them back any money they may have given you.

• How do you defend yourself if the mail loses what you send out?

Well, that's easy: YOU DON'T. The Blame Game could go on for weeks. You have to ask yourself: 'What's more worth the effort....arguing with someone and raising each other's blood pressure, or just using THAT energy to make a duplicate piece and resend it?" The latter can be rewarding for both the seller and customer. Imagine being GENEROUS in this situation and just using your energy to make someone happy no matter WHAT the cost? And in the end if you can't afford (monetarily) to do that, then maybe you aren't in the right line of business.

• Would you believe someone who said the mail lost it? Or would you think they never sent it out or that they broke it without telling?

If the SELLER says the mail lost it, then if I were the seller, I'd make a new piece and resend it with a disclaimer saying that if THIS one gets lost in the mail as well, then perhaps there should be discussed the possibility of a partial or half refund. The SELLER should take all precautions to make sure that the package has tracking numbers and insurance. (If the customer and seller want to discuss who pays for these then thats all just details, but the seller should as least OFFER to cover both if they want to ensure happy and REPEAT customers). The CUSTOMER at this point also has an obligation to realize that it takes two to tango, and needs to understand that issues happen on both sides. Buying something online is a RISK and you have to take into consideration that SOME SELLERS ARE CROOKS. Perhaps there can be something done through the postal services in which this offense occured, and the postal service can fork over any insurance money that has been taken out on the packages and that can go to the respective receivers (Im not sure how postal insurance works to you guys are going to have to enlighten me!) As far as believing someone of they said they never received it, for the FIRST claim, yes, TOTALLY as long as it could be proved through tracking numbers (i.e the package drops off the face of the earth). I mean if the number SAYS that the package has been delivered to their front door yet they CLAIM they never received it, then bring to their attention the PROOF that it did arrive. After that, then I think its going to take some serious talking between the customer and seller to resolve the transaction. HOWEVER I am a firm believer that if either the seller OR customer is not keeping in touch, then they FORFEIT. The only excuse for not keeping in touch with your customer or your seller are things like if you're in a COMA or you're DEAD. If a family member dies...SORRY, that's still no excuse...take 5 minutes out of your day to let people know, after all they CANNOT read your mind and you are running a business and its your responsibility to let people know what the deal is! You went on vacation? THAT is a bunch of CRAP. I'm sorry, but you're in a TRANSACTION. If you have PLANS, then don't GET INTO a transaction where people are COUNTING ON YOU. Give people AMPLE NOTICE that specific things are going to be happening, its that simple. Even if you just have someone on the side who FILLS IN responding to emails and PMs for you when something personal comes up, THAT'S ALL PEOPLE WANT is to be kept OUT OF THE DARK.


• What kind of feedback would be left after a transaction like that? With the item being bought going missing or damaged somehow?

I'm not sure, tbh! I would definitely give all the FACTS and PROOF, and then just be honest about it! However, after a seller has done all he/she can to make the customer happy and the customer is STILL not happy, I think its the seller's job to let others know in the feedback section that this customer is a hothead, so enter into transactions at your own risk!

 

The ONLY way to deal with this responsibly is to not sell any item unless it's insured for the FULL amount and tracked.

 

I always use USPS to ship. I almost always get the delivery confirmation since it is only an extra .70 cents (.85 if not priority) and I always keep my receipt until the items makes its destination. ( This applies to US only)
I find the only time losing an item can be an issue is when it goes overseas. There is really no way to track overseas unless you pay for Global Express Shipping often it is so expensive people are willing to chance it, even priority for most items can be anywhere from 12.95-55.00 when you are buying a small item you do not want to pay 10x what you paid for the item for shipping. Priority can only be tracked until it leaves the US once it leaves it is very difficult to track because it requires the Country it has arrived in to scan their label into the USPS database by my experience not all Countries are willing to do this, plus often items sit in customs anywhere from days to weeks. There are also issues such as a package gets delivered and stolen off someones porch. In that instance would not be the sellers problem. I would have to question if a Seller was so lazy as to not keep a simple receipt as proof. You can remember to keep your tax receipts right?
One other thing is the Market Place is not a business, people who sell on the marketplace are not business people, in most cases so they may not get how that works, so to say companies resent tons of merchandise does not really apply to the marketplace where often there is only one of an item and most people selling on the Marketplace are not running a business and cannot deduced loses as a business can. One major factor for anyone buying on the MP is to check peoples feedback. If it looks questionable request a copy of the receipt or delivery confirmation.

 

Actually one alternative to EMS/Global Express is Registered. It is considerably cheaper but has its own restrictions (and tends to take a little longer) But it does make a trail so that any item sent that way can be tracked. The biggest negative is sometimes the tracking does not update on-line and you need to actually call the 1800# and speak to a representative. I had a package once take a while to get to Europe and had to do so and found out that way the package was in Customs at its destination country.

I've sold a lot of items (doll and anime) through the years as well as just sent packages to friends and acquaintances. I've so far only had two packages go astray when sending from the US, one was to Malaysia and had no sort of tracking/insurance and I just ate the loss and one with DC to someone in PA (it got sent to HSN for reasons unknown and got lost.) Again I ate the loss. When shipping things from abroad, I've only had a handful of postcards go missing. I have had a few packages that vanished for upwards of a month before magically appearing but I always assumed those had somehow accidentally gotten sent sea mail.

Within the US I always send everything with DC. For things above $50 in value I try to impress upon people to get insurance and if they are reluctant still I will sometimes work out a deal to give the items full coverage.

Things get trickier when selling abroad since the majority of International buyers I've encountered ask you to mark down their packages. (Yes, I know not everyone does, but definitely the majority of people I've sold to have.) If an item is under $50 I tend to risk airmail if that is what the buyer chooses. (I always make sure to give them several different shipping options and explain those differences and then let them choose) When an item is pricier I tend to insist a buyer has it sent Registered or Global Express for my peace of mind so that it can be tracked.

I know when I am buying things, I am willing to risk airmail if an item is cheap enough. I usually only try to buy from sellers with a lot of feedback for items that I'm not willing to pay for tracking on.

 

• If there is no proof of having been shipped and you get nothing or it is broken, where is the blame placed?

There really isn't a situation where there should be no proof of shipping. Even without insurance or delivery confirmation, a seller should have a receipt from the post office, and the USPS does put the receiving address and the price of shipping on it. If a seller can't produce those items, I'd start to suspect foul play.

• How do you defend yourself if the mail loses what you send out?

I keep all my receipts as proof of mailing, and tell my buyers up front that if they don't purchase insurance on their items there's nothing I can do for them if their package goes missing. Often I'll put the delivery confirmation on at my own cost just to have that extra insurance for my own piece of mind.

• Would you believe someone who said the mail lost it? Or would you think they never sent it out or that they broke it without telling?

If they have proof they mailed the package and it never arrives, yes. I've had it happen (and in that case it turned up weeks later having made a merry journal through the wilds of western Massachusetts). If they didn't, again, there's no reason not to have a receipt, so I'd be skeptical.

• What kind of feedback would be left after a transaction like that? With the item being bought going missing or damaged somehow?

I think I'd wait a long time before I left someone feedback for a missing item, because if I have proof it's en route, I'm more likely to wait and see if it turns up for a few weeks than leave them permanent feedback that says it didn't. If it was really gone, I'd probably describe the transaction up to that point, whether there was good communication, timely shipping, etc, and then make a note that the item hadn't arrived as planned in as neutral a tone as possible. It's not a seller's fault if the PO loses something they clearly sent out.

 

without answering all of the questions individually... i would just reiterate that it is totally irresponsible to ship anything that you have sold in the MP without some kind of tracking, and full insurance. i have met with some resistance when asking a seller for full insurance... i get a reply such as...."insurance is a waste of money, i have never lost anything"... to which i offer to pay extra.... all it takes is one time.

another issue that has start to come up is.... the option to pay by the "personal option", so that no fees are taken out.... the problem with this is, paypal will not honor this as any kind of commercial transaction, meaning, if the item does not arrive, or does not arrive in the condition as stated, then you cannot open any kind of dispute or claim against the seller.... if a seller insists on you paying by the personal payment option, i would think twice about buying from them.

nothing is fail safe.... so using good judgement while buying from the MP is essential.

 

Correct me if I am wrong but don't you have to purchase Priority mail to purchase the registered option? I have a really hard time with overseas buyers wanting to pay for Priority plus insurance almost all have asked their packages to be sent First Class which I was told by USPS was not track able at all. If that is incorrect I would really like to know because I would happily add that to my first class overseas shipments since it is only a few dollars more versus the cost of Priority.
I sent an outfit to the Netherlands and Priority shipping was $49.00 and that did not included insurance or was it registered, so you can see most people don't want to pay that.

MissAlly- I have never had a Seller say insurance was useless. Scary! But I have been asked to select the personal tab. I was a little worried but they were very inexpensive items so I risked it and it came out okay. Another totally different issue I have had is with Ebay and using your balance and items disappearing but that is a whole other subject.

Edit: I was incorrect it is the opposite. Registered can be used with First Class but for Priority it is either proof of mailing very inexpensive or Pick up on demand not registered for Priority. In some cases depending on which country you are mailing to it may be cheaper to just go with Priority but for others definitely First Class registered. I will have to use that for my international shipping. Thanks

 

• If there is no proof of having been shipped and you get nothing or it is broken, where is the blame placed?

Seller. It is a stupid business practice to not keep the receipt until the buyer says they are happy with the item.

• How do you defend yourself if the mail loses what you send out?

I always keep the receipt and track the package myself. I msg the buyer to ask if the item is ok prior to throwing the receipt away.

• Would you believe someone who said the mail lost it? Or would you think they never sent it out or that they broke it without telling?

I always insist on tracking, so if I don't get a tracking number within 3 days of me paying, I get suspicious. Since I am very clear about my requirements as a buyer prior to the sale, then no I wouldn't believe them if they said it was lost but couldn't produce tracking.

• What kind of feedback would be left after a transaction like that? With the item being bought going missing or damaged somehow?

I would explain that the seller did not live up to their end of the bargain on any aspect of the transaction. This shows a lack of maturity and understanding that this is a business transaction and should be treated as such.

All too commonly the sellers come up with lame excuses:
I can't find the receipt, I left at work, home, school etc and it takes another week to get the tracking and by then you find they shipped it 4 days after they promised, paid half what they quoted you for shipping, and didn't insure it.

My favorite one recently was the seller that berated the buyer for being anxious about the shipping date and told her she should be glad since the seller paid more for the doll originally and had to wait 6 months for her to ship. The same seller than had her friend explain that the seller was in the process of moving and that she shipped within the agreed time even though she "had to walk for an hour to the post office" to do it.

WTF didnt she think of that when she took the money?

/endrant

 

LOL I read that as well. I always ship within 3 days but usually the next unless it is the weekend. I want that item on their way the faster it arrives the faster the positive feedback comes and the faster I can check that one off. Sometimes, I think, people do not understand how being a good seller works. I will say I have had some really fantastic buyers and sellers on DOA.

 

I recently learned that trying to keep shipping costs low for people on small items by including confirmation as an option was not a good idea.
Even though I stated in my thread I would not be responsible for lost packages, in the end I ended up refunding a package that got lost in the mail... I felt in the end it was my fault for not insisting on a tracking method.

 

It actually wasn't a doll at all, but I had a shipper from Canada who'd sent me an item for Christmas that never showed up. After what I expected was a reasonable amount of time, I did let them know about it, but they were quite professional, and at no cost to me sent another of their stock out, which was more than I had expected to have happen. They also sent it by another method which was trackable, also appreciated.

(Funny situation that, the second package they sent actually showed up at my workplace, which was completely not the address this guy had for me, my PayPal and EBay addys are all my home address. It was sooo bizarre, I've been so confused about that ever since, it makes no sense to me at all. Every other package from Canada arrives where it ought to... )

So that's professionalism, and what I would be expecting from, say, a doll company, that they would act responsibly if something happened to a package. I've had damage from Soom and Luts in the past, and they've always been responsible about it, thankfully.

Now for individuals selling a one-off item? Fully insured. Tracking. Delivery confirmation. If they want me to sign for it, no probs. And for the whole mailman situation, you need to complain to the Postmaster General about his behavior, take pictures when your mail is damaged and such (you shouldn't have to pay for new cans, the postal folks should). You might be able to get him on a different route, and at the very least an investigation should be opened up on him.

.hlp

 

• If there is no proof of having been shipped and you get nothing or it is broken, where is the blame placed?

case per case...I experienced this one before...twice...i blame myself for not choosing registered one...even so, i think the seller should also offer it...i remember, when i asked about it, the seller didn't answer and only talk round and round and round (like it's more expensive, etc, etc...blah! i pay for the shipping, why would she have to be so noisy?)

• How do you defend yourself if the mail loses what you send out?
no receipt number, no proof...that's why, i always at least send with registered...
also wrap it securely and neatly...last time i sent my package to japan, the receiver said, thank's for wraping it securely (^.^)'''...i was quite panic so i wrap her order with double karton and bubble...it was an expensive handmade of mine afterall...i love my creation and don't want to loose or damage it although it's practically not mine anymore (i mean it's bought already)...

• Would you believe someone who said the mail lost it? Or would you think they never sent it out or that they broke it without telling?
case per case...depends...it depends on the seller manner...besides, i always ask them to wrap my order neatly and securely because my place is rainy and humid in (certain season)...or in other case, i ask them to secure it because the stuff seems pointy and thin...I was afraid it was gonna broken or something...

• What kind of feedback would be left after a transaction like that? With the item being bought going missing or damaged somehow?
tell the truth...in etsy, i used to decide not to give a negative feedback because of the seller manner...i took the risk of loosing package (not using register) but then the seller offer me register next time...my stuff was never lost ever since...i like this seller a lot...

 

@Tsukidoll: i just knew it insurance can be added to first class...i think, no one ever said about it in their policy...mmm??? i think i saw once but forgot...i thought at first time...aaah...with insurance? you mean priority type?...i didn't really ask about it to the seller

 

Hmmm it could just be me, but I've had awful luck with Global Priority so I tend to not use it unless someone specifically requests it. I had one package take close to 2 months to arrive at its destination (luckily my buyer was super patient and yes I think I did scan my receipt to show that I had paid/sent out her items) So usually it is airmail for me.

For me personally the biggest problems with Registered is you can not use or have any clear plastic tape on the package. I like to re-use boxes and I don't like that fiber tape you need to get wet to make it stick. However I have sent a lot of packages Registered through the years to give myself that added protection. I sold a PF to someone in Italy a bunch of years ago and I sent a few other doll parts Airmail Registered to Europe. Most recently when I used Registered I actually got on-line tracking which was a happy surprise. For something relatively light like a PF or doll clothes or a doll head it is much cheaper and still gives tracking vs any of the other shipping methods I know of.

I keep all receipts until items are received and I also keep the money in my PayPal until items have arrived.

 

I require everything I sell to have delivery confirmation and insurance on it. Not only to insure that it gets there, but to cover myself as well.

I also keep all my receipts for not only confirmation, but also for the fact that I need them for tax purposes. Out of the 10 years I've been selling stuff online, I've only had one item not show up to a client. Of course now that I say that, I'm probably jinxing myself.

 

• How do you defend yourself if the mail loses what you send out?

Actually, I encountered this precisely. I was to receive a pair of pants and a shirt in a trade for my Homme Ducan boy (there was also money involved), and they were sent with no insurance, simply because we didn't think (yes, I know, I know) that it was worth it, because the seller is from the UK, and the last time I had something sent fromt he UK to the US with insurance and tracking, it was a good deal more, so we felt it should be safe. The picture below shows the result:


Uploaded with ImageShack.us

I spoke with the Postmaster and filed a claim for 'Mail received without contents'. I have not heard anything beyond having a filing number, though I contacted the person who sent them right away (we'd been waiting on them for a while). I was kind of ready to accept the loss, but we came to an agreement and she is working to make replacement clothes for me (and this time, they'll be sent with insurance!)

• Would you believe someone who said the mail lost it? Or would you think they never sent it out or that they broke it without telling?

I've been on both sides of this. I've sent something out and someone informed me, two months later, that they never received the item. Because it was a simple thing, I just remade it and sent it out again. When they contacted me a third time, demanding their money back because I'd obviously failed to send anything at all, I gave them their money back and told them to take their business elsewhere, and that if I find out that they did receieve both items (artworks done by hand) and tried to get money back out of me, that I would make sure they paid me in full for both.

I've also paid for an item that was supposedly sent out and was given a tracking number for it--only the tracking number never worked. It was a small thing, and I didn't really care (I got my $8 back when I spoke up about taking it to Paypal), but it did make me leery about buying from Ebay for some time...

• What kind of feedback would be left after a transaction like that? With the item being bought going missing or damaged somehow?

With my transaction of the clothes going missing in the mail, I left her stellar feedback, because it wasn't her fault that they went missing, because the package itself did arrive--she even offered to make it right for me! For the buyer who insisted a remake (twice) and a refund, I left 'Seller beware' feedback, that she paid promptly, but after numberous sendings of the product, that she demanded a refund for items never delivered. For the seller whose item I never received (still living at the same address) and had refunded my money, I left 'Item paid, undelivered, refunded' feedback.

 

Just wanting to throw out there that Delivery Confirmation is not infallible. I have, on two occasions now, received packages addressed to the house with the same house number one block behind me that had delivery confirmation. I'm a good neighbor, so I walked them over there and dropped them in the correct mailbox, but had I not the packages would have registered as delivered, but never have arrived at the correct destination. Which would be a complete and utter mess that I would hate to have to face on either end.

When I am buying or selling anything, I always get insurance if it isn't something I feel I am willing to loose money on if it gets lost in the mail. When I sell the doll shirts I make I send them first class mail without any add ons because the packaging I use is too small to qualify for DC and the cost of registered mail is a bit more than I feel is fair for what I am sending, and insuring under $15 worth of stuff is not cost effective in my book either. If I was having problems with items not arriving, then I might think these options worth considering, but I've had no troubles so far. But I accept that if a buyer does not get their package, it is my job to make the situation right, because I don't offer an alternative. Likewise if I choose to opt out of paying for insurance when it is offered, I acknowledge that I will take the hit if my item does not arrive.

As for believing a buyer when they say they didn't get a package, I would unless I had some very solid reason to suspect otherwise. It just isn't good practice in my book to treat people like you think they are crooks when you have no real reason to believe they are.

 

• If there is no proof of having been shipped and you get nothing or it is broken, where is the blame placed?

I try to be the kind of person who gives everyone the benefit of the doubt... but if I have a seller who claims they shipped to me and hasn't kept the receipt or even let me know when it goes in the mail? I'm tempted to think that something's afoot. It sucks, but it's there. It's good business practice to notify a buyer when you're mailing things out, and to keep the receipt.

• How do you defend yourself if the mail loses what you send out?

First and foremost, I take preventative measures. I make certain a buyer knows all of the options when I send something out. I'm also just a wee bit paranoid about making sure that everything is well-packaged (having been on the receiving end of poor packaging). And I cover my butt. I post on my sales threads that if the buyer doesn't opt to pay for a tracking method or insurance then I am not responsible for loss or damage, I keep the receipts, I notify the buyer when I've mailed it, I pack things in lots of cushioning...and I pester my buyers when I haven't heard that the item's arrived.

• Would you believe someone who said the mail lost it? Or would you think they never sent it out or that they broke it without telling?

Well, I've actually dealt with both of these situations. The easiest and best-handled was a pair of eyes I purchased last year. The seller was in Canada, and because it was the holiday season, I was prepared to settle in to wait for them to arrive... but weekly I checked with the seller with a "it's not here yet" update. After more than a month had passed, we declared it lost and settled in to figure out how to handle it. Before I could suggest anything else, the seller apologized profusely and refunded me the money. I never did end up with those eyes, and I hope that they got bounced back to their point of origin at the very least.

The worst was a puki faceplate that I had purchased that arrived ...well, mangled. The seller had used a flattened (popped) single layer of bubble wrap and stuck it in a document mailer. When it arrived, the nose had been scraped off and the lip had been flattened.. it was a bit of an ordeal for me, actually, because I'd been wanting that faceplate quite badly. Worse, the seller did not respond to any contact attempts for several days, then offered to pay for "repair" work that would have cost even more than the faceplate did! Eventually, after much stress and fretting, she refunded me the money and I sent the faceplate back to her--along with the original packaging--but when it left MY hands, the packaging was intense and well-padded. ...I actually later saw her trying to sell the same faceplate on the MP for far more than she should have expected to get for it, and was happy to show buyers who asked questions in her sales thread the pictures that I had of the damage. As well as to explain just how the damage had occurred...since she wasn't disclosing that and said it was only "minor" damage that was "easily and cheaply repaired."

• What kind of feedback would be left after a transaction like that? With the item being bought going missing or damaged somehow?

I think it depends on how the seller handles it. In the first case that I mentioned above, I left happy feedback. While I wasn't thrilled by the loss of the eyes, I did end up satisfied with how well it was handled. He'd been polite and calm, even apologetic, when things didn't work out. I didn't come out feeling hassled or stressed, just disappointed. I'd cheerfully do business with him again in the future.

With the second situation? I left polite, but unhappy, feedback. I'd paid for priority shipping, never once thinking they'd try to cut corners and send a piece of resin in a flat document mailer. She was hard to get in touch with, uncooperative and unhelpful when I was freaking out about the damage... and later was being dishonest with potential buyers of the same faceplate. Not only would I not do business with that person again, but I wouldn't recommend that anyone does.

It IS situational, and varies with every occurrence. The best thing that you can do is be polite, and realize that people on both ends of the transaction aren't enjoying what's going on. Work together and find a solution that works for everyone involved.

 

Honestly, I think the responsiblity falls both on the seller and the buyer. It is the buyer's responsiblity to ask for insurance/tracking/delivery confirmation just as it is the seller's job to offer it. I notice lots of seller's don't list full shipping terms in their threads and leave that to PMs to discuss, therefore when asking for a shipping quote the buyer needs to be specific on what they expect. There are TONS of people especially when shipping internationally who ask for their packages marked down or sent a cheaper option which in my opinion is at the risk of the buyer. The only safegaurd for the seller when the buyer doesn't want insurance or tracking is to purchase a "certificate of mailing", which doesn't say anything but proof that you mailed it and on what day. This way the buyer knows it has been mailed.

Although really I think it is plain silly to drop $$$$ down on a doll and not want to pay full insurance or have tracking. Compainies usually auto-mark down to save on high insurance fees, even when not asked, so I think because of that they are responsible for the package if it gets lost. But I think that is different from just a seller who was asked by the buyer to mark it down. When selling I only take the "once mailed its not my responsiblity" stance when the person doesn't want any kind of insurance or tracking after I have offered it, I don't think its my responsiblity to come out of pocket because the buyer is being irresponsible (however as I mentioned I protect myself by buying a certificate of mailing). It IS the seller's responsibility to make sure the package has been properly sealed and packed so if it is handled roughly or opened by customs, the package can still be resealed securely,

A quick note on the paypal "personal" issue. I wouldn't buy from anyone who I couldn't trust sending a personal payment to as they are just as likely to rip you off. Paypal only refunds out of pocket for ebay transactions, regular transactions are only refunded if the seller has any funds in their paypal account. Its likely if they were trying to rip you off by the time you file a dispute the seller would have already withdrawn the money from it. :/