Do you feel alone in the hobby? (even with the forum)

Besides at cons, no one around me knows about or has any interest in the hobby and I'm actually a little afraid to tell my friends about it because they find it to be "creepy". So yeah, lonely is pretty spot on.

 

Sometimes. I actually have a large group within state for BJDs. However, with large groups comes some ... drama. I don't get along with everyone and it's a city, so people are generally flaky. I also don't live super-close to most of the people I do get along with. They're all an hour or more away. It was recently that I realized I got into dolls because of my loneliness here. I don't fit in with city people and it's hard to get close to others in such a dense population (ymmv). In our previous place of residence, we were cut off from civilization, so we made tons of great friends relatively quickly. Out here, it has not been that way at all.

My dolls themselves ease my loneliness. I squirrel away every extra penny for them, I take pictures of them everyday and they hang out with me on my days off. I even take them to work sometimes. I understand that the dolls are a result of my loneliness. I couldn't get close to people, so I became close to my dolls. I've decided being 'lonely' really isn't so bad at all. I live a much more peaceful existence with this moderate level of disconnect.

 

I hope you are able to eventually meet some people you can talk with about dolls. Even online people who will Skype with you might help you feel less alone. It's not quite the same as in-person interaction, but it's better than nothing. ^_^

Maybe Skype chat with the friends who got you into the hobby?

 

Just think how much worse it was before there was the internet!!! Those were tough times for people who enjoyed unusual hobbies... That's how the first sci-fi and anime and other types of conventions started, because it was the only way for people who liked the same things to come together--and many people had to save up all year and travel great distances to get to the few cons there were.

At least with the internet people can see that there are others out there. Before--you were REALLY and truly alone!

 

It seems that people are way more lonely nowadays. Put I admit I wouldn't even know about BJDs without the internet, so well, it's useful for rare hobbies like BJDs.
I don't feel lonely, I do not really care about meeting people in this hobby because my friends know about my love for BJDs and are really positive. But I like to enjoy this hobby on my own and it does not bother me not to spend afternoons talking about dolls and stuff. My local community is also very lazy so meetup does not happen more than once in a year mostly because not a lot of people would come anyways. Lazy, I said ~

But I'd truly like to have more online BJD lover friends :3 it' s just hard for me to keep in touch when I don't see people irl. How paradoxical.

 

Yes it can be lonely. My sister has bjds (thanks to my influence) and a friend collects fashion doll types, but both live far away. I have non bjds as well.

 

I'm lucky as my sister shares our flat, and was dollicted a few years ago. We admired BJDs from afarfor years and then I got myselve into the hobby in earnest. I got her, her grail doll, and even if she isn't as active as I am, she understands when I ramble about dolls on end, do whatever creative project involving them and can't think of anything else but resin boys.
Well she sometimes sais I should get out a bit more and perhaps ad a few humans to my list of friends...
I'm very happy I have her.

 

I totally feel isolated in this hobby, but then, I'm in a tiny town in rural Western Australia. DOA helps, but I'm hopeless at getting to know people online. Once we get past initial intros and chat I just run out of things to say. I'm not much of a people person, even when I want to be.

 

All the doll people I know of live in every other part of the state but mine so it's kind of lonely.

 

i don't know any doll people in my city, and online i am very shy so sometimes i feel alone with this hobby. but forums and stuffs help even if its just reading other posts

 

I can understand all of this! I lived in a big city for a long time and had lots of friends who lived close by, but then I moved to the states to another big city and I have virtually no friends! Now I'm getting into dolls again.

But, I don't think of myself as lonely in the hobby, I'm happy enjoying hobbies on my own, I'm just lonely full stop! I actually find it really hard to make friends at meet ups (Not just doll meet ups but any interest group) as I actually don't have much to say about my hobbies and talking about them isn't the fun part for me! I'd rather just meet people who are similar and not talk about a particular interest. So, I went to a knitting/sewing & drinking meet up and we had a great time taking about travel and study and things.

 

Hi im kinda glad im not the only one who feels like this, as im from a semi small town in England and i have no one who likes dolls and i cant talk to no one about dolls as everyone thinks im weird for collecting Dolls, or they think the dolls are freaky, id love to have a nearby friend who loves to dolls too, but how do you go searching for friends who like the hobby without people being mean about it :/

 

Sookiecookie

I'm not sure how far Worthing is too me but I'm from London and if it was possible for you to reach London you can join the Pygmalion Society which has local London meets or if you even host your own meets in the 'meets' category and see if anyone is interested. You never know.

 

I fee fairly alone in the hobby. Even here as I do not feel a part of. I am afraid I am going to break a rule. So mostly I just lurk

 

I felt very lonely in the hobby for many years! My mom got into BJDs which was wonderful, but she doesn't do much with them anymore. I remember one year, during Christmas, I actually made a wish to meet some BJD people whom I could talk with and share the hobby with. I think my wish was answered and you know how?
YOUTUBE! hahaha
Yes, Youtube has saved this hobby for me. There is a remarkable and extremely supportive and inspiring BJD community in Youtube land. I've made some really wonderful friends whom I can talk with and share ideas with and so much more. Being able to hear someone's voice or see their face, makes everything so much more intimate, it's almost like meeting someone in person. And we feed off of each other, we share our inspiration, our thoughts, our highs and lows and we all benefit and learn something from it. It's been really wonderful, I feel like I'm apart of something now. I don't think I would be where I am today in the hobby if the Youtube community didn't exist.

If there is anyone interested in trying out the Youtube community, please, feel free to send me a message and I would be more than happy to send you some really wonderful channel links - there are some incredible dolly people out there making videos!

 

I'm one of those people who's been weird for years (wayyyy before BJDs) - wrote letters to save the original Star Trek, etc. I also am pretty socially adept (although there are lots of times I just want to chill & be by myself). So, I've just roped all my friends into looking at my dolls Some think they are creepy, some love them, some don't care - but they all get to see at least one pic of my new dolls. Plus I take dolls to random events. I am lucky in that 2 of my friends here are doll collectors (not BJDs but dolls/puppets) & there is an active MeetUp group in this area so we meet every 2-3 months.
I'm a big geek, into anime, SF, Kdramas, Tolkien, blah blah - so I am a member of several meet-up geeky groups - so not so lonely LOL

 

I know there are BJD people in my area because I can see that from a casual glance at user stats on here but the meetups all seem to be in the middle of the state and way up at the top of the state, never here. I never see anything about meetups here on here or elsewhere. The one other person who lives here that I know from on here admits she goes several hours out of town to meets. I've also seen other people I don't know as well mentioning they do also. I just can't do that. So yeah, it gets a bit lonely for me mostly because I know there are people here and they're just not available for me to socialize with.

I've actually tried to organize a local meet up several times. Put ads up in places the local doll people would likely see them. The few people that got in touch all made excuses as to why they couldn't be available to actually meet up here locally despite their supposed interest. They all live in the same city as me and yet they just can't commit to even meeting for a slice of pizza and some doll talk once in a while. I could never get anyone to commit to a meetup that didn't involve me driving for 2-3 hours somewhere else to a meetup situation that was already going on and had been for some time. Since the whole point was establishing something local it was rather frustrating to realize that people would rather drive all that way then even try to create a local doll club with me. I finally just gave it up.

I actually moved back here from the west coast a couple of years ago for family reasons. I can't move back yet but one of the reasons I want to go back someday is the fact that there are active doll people and convenient meetups where I want to live. Next time I move and settle somewhere it will be somewhere like that. If not there, than somewhere else with the kinds of social groups I want to be a part of.

Living here has just totally sucked in terms of that for me. Social stuff in general sucks. The only social interaction I get down here is hanging with the few friends I've known since I was 10 and going to yoga, and even then no one socializes much after yoga even though the place I take yoga at has a cafe/bookstore where people are encouraged to gather and do that. The two photo clubs I used to belong to, same thing. It's all about that one hour and no one hangs afterwards. I joined to meet other photography obsessed people, maybe make some new friends, but it did me little good in terms of having a social life and I finally gave it up this year.

Part of it I think is that I live in a rather conservative state am straight and not married at an age when almost everyone else is. People don't do much in terms of socializing except go to church related gatherings or sports bars and I'm not really into either crowd. I'm not religious nor much of a drinker and on top of that I'm single which apparently makes most married women I've met here a bit leery of hanging out with me. I'm not safely coupled, and here that's not something people locally are too comfortable with. Also, adult woman playing with dolls? That's a very weird thing to people here, unless they're doing it themselves or they are over 70 when it's seen as more of a safe old ladies hobby and a bit more acceptable. It doesn't matter that they're expensive collector's dolls. It's still considered pretty weird.

Back when I lived out there I wasn't into BJD's and there wasn't much interest in terms of the other dolls I collect so I didn't go. But now there are BJD meetups all over the place out there and I think it would be very different since I am into BJD's myself now. I'm ready to move back in a big way, but unfortunately that just can't be so I'm going to be stuck doing this on my own for a while yet. I really look forward to moving to some big city where BJD meetups are a normal part of life though. It's just too boring being about the only person I know with BJD's here...

 

I don't have any in person friends.. doll friends or otherwise...just my husband and daughters. My older daughter thinks I'm weird and the younger likes them but is horse crazy so she will probably never join the hobby. Luckily I don't mind enjoying them alone. I would probably be too chicken to go to a meet anyway. There are sometimes meets in Charlotte but I have never been brave enough to go.

 

You are near Denver right?
I moved to CO a few years ago and just seem to have the hardest time clicking with people here! While I've been collecting BJD and a few other things a while, since I moved here I've just like exploded with collecting other things like MLP, and other toy line stuff. I know I do it a lot out of boredom. I think it's interesting you feel you don't connect because of the "city" mentality here because I consider myself a city person and this whole state just feels like an enormous suburb to me (yes even the downtown areas) spotted with empty fields of nothingness.

*My apologies to anyone who loves this state, I know a lot of you who live here think it's amazing, but I just fail to see the charm.

But specifically on the topic of feeling alone in the BJD hobby. I've never felt alone geographically. Every place I've lived in so far has had a pretty decent BJD community. I only ever feel alone sometimes in the type of collector I am. I don't do the whole character thing. I don't name my dolls. They don't have stories or developed personalities. I adore them. I enjoy buying them pretty things to wear. That's about it. I feel like my style of BJD collecting is not that common.

 

besides online i dont know anyone in my real life who is into it so yeah i can relate, if i moved away to a larger place then maybe but where i am there is no scene here for this type of thing.

also like how Nell mentioned above, i dont do background stories or characters, even doing names is something i loathe, lol, but i love buying cool stuff like clothes and wigs and enjoy taking photos because they're pretty.

i am friends with a local b&w film photographers group and i did consider bringing one along to be photographed, i still might, it may be a way to get some interest, inanimate objects is something they do on a regular basis and im pretty sure not a single one of them would have ever seen a bjd before.

 

No, I do not feel lonely! I have several friends who love BJD. And, most importantly, my girlfriend loves BJD and fully supports me! =)

 

I guess I'm not so alone in feeling alone, lol.
True there are meetups in my local area, but yep, I'm a chicken, so just the thought of going to one makes me hyperventilate. I do have online bjd friends who live on the East Coast, and boy, I sure wish I could actually meet them in person as they are wonderful. Still, I would love to meet someone local. Anything is possible!

 

I know there's several meetup groups in my area, and I've seen quite a few threads get set up here on DoA... nevertheless, I've never gone to any of them (I'm excited for my first meet around the end of June, but I'm still kinda terrified) and I get what you're saying about being lonely. Actually, I feel pretty lonely online, too - a lot of people on Tumblr/DoA/other sites seem to be really close and have friends they talk to about BJDs, but I don't really have anyone like that. @.@ I mean, my boyfriend and my parents and my roommate will listen if I talk to them about anything, and my boyfriend/my parents even help me with doing stuff sometimes like restringing and troubleshooting with clothes. But, it's just not the same as having that one good dolly friend, at least that's the feeling that I get from seeing all those posts.

Well, hopefully that will change soon, and I hope things change for you too! Hang in there!

 

No one that I know in RL even knew of the existence of BJD, let alone are interested in them. But I'm fine with that. I've only seen one person from my country on DoA so far though, and she doesn't seem to be active anymore. :<
My brother thinks it's creepy, and my parents have outright told me that they're worried I'm becoming a freak. So that all kinda sucks, but I'm still hopeful that they'll come around once they understand that there's a creative part to this hobby, which is what attracted me and they've all been very supportive of my creative outlets in the past.

 

No, Years ago on another forum I used to chat with a few girls we then started a facebook group so we could group chat. 3 years later we still talk nearly everyday and although we are located all over Australia and the USA we actually met up in Sydney last year.

 

Most of the people I know that see my dolls for the first time think they are really beautiful. I don't carry my dolls around or actively make sure they know about them. They see them when they come to my home. I have them in various rooms, so I can enjoy them. I like making things for them when I have the time, and I used to love to photograph them, again when I have time.

If you like your dolls, that's the only thing that matters. I don't think dolls (any object/ hobby) should be the focus of your life, and therefor you shouldn't be lonely if you put all things into prospective. Hobbies are fun, and if you can share them that's always a plus. You are welcome to share all you want on this forum.

 

I sometimes feel a little alone. But going to doll meetups has definitely helped me. I also got one of my friends into dolls, (and she's my best friend, too... and always blames me for why she's broke all the time. *siiiigh*) so it isn't so bad. But sometimes I sit in my room and wonder what it would be like if I could have more friends close by that were into dolls. Needless to say, it's one of the reasons I'm so excited for Dollism. An entire weekend full of dolly friends and dolls! lol

 

I don't have any in-person doll friends, however my family asks questions about them and my fiancé is wonderful when it comes to my hobbies. He tries to take an interest and help me pick out clothes, eyes, dolls, etc. I suppose sometimes it feels a little lonely since I don't have anyone to meet with that also collects BJDs/dolls, but I don't mind it. They give me something to do when my fiancé is working weird hours or weekends and they facilitate my photography, drawing, and writing.

 

I was pretty lonely... until my girlfriend moved in with me. She loves dolls too, so it's great having someone to talk and gush about them with. Plus she helps me make clothes for them, which is awesome since I am horrible at sewing.

 

Yeah, its pretty lonely for me. Its a downer when I get excited about an event or new/limited release and no one in my family really cares. Im going to my first doll meet this month so im optimistic. Its hard explaining to people why a guy would be interested in a bjd.

 

I've always been a bit of a loner so it isn't a big deal that no one else around me is into the hobby.
Although I like going on DoA and just chat, since it isn't as stressful as dealing with people face to face.
I like doing my own stuff, whether it be looking for doll-sized things, making stuff for them or photographing them.
So I guess this hobby really is perfect for me, I can enjoy it by myself.

Though every now and then I'll take my doll home and show them to my family who do become fascinated with them just coz it's something new.
I've had a family member comment that they weren't surprised I'm into stuff like this coz it really suited me. I took that as a compliment.

Also, my mum likes going to conventions. You know, food, electronics, computers, toys. She loves checking out weird and new stuff. So taking her to a doll convention was no biggy. OH...and she refuses to leave until the lottery is over.

 

I have never met another person in real life interested in BJDs...never so it's been pretty lonely.... Even in this forum where everyone has the same love for BJDS, I just don't connect with anyone and never have made a friend in here so I come here just to read information, see other people's dolls but never to socialize...guess I will always be alone in this hobby but it is what it is.

 

I feel pretty lonely in this hobby, I don't really know anyone in the hobby and everyone I seem to meets is quiet a bit older than me which is somewhat intimidating. And it doesn't help I'm to scared to approach people because I'm shy. But my dolls do help with the lonely feeling and i do have a non-dolly friend who supports me ouo

 

I do feel lonely at times but I know part of that is my fault! I've never been great at initiating conversations (but once you get me going I can talk!) and never want to try and talk to someone before they talk to me. So I realize that part of my problem stems from my just being...well me!
I am working on it though, and hope to start doing youtube videos someday [we will see!].
Good luck everyone, just know that there are plenty of people out there looking for support and friendship that may be shy! There are some GREAT people in this hobby!

 

All the time.
I can't seem to really connect to people in this hobby. I'm busy, so I have limited time for hobby related things, so maybe that's hurting me as well. I feel disconnected from everything. The only friend I have who owns a doll is a long term penpal. They started out in Memphis and the first time we ever saw one another was when they flew up to visit me and brought their little soom doll along! I will never forget that. We were both beginners in the Hobby and had never been able to interact with other owners before. Now they have moved and moved again, this time out to CA and they are less into the hobby. So once again I am rather friendless.

None of my friends are that into it. I'm shy about it as dolls don't seem to suit me so well, and everyone is shocked that I have them. Most friends just stick to 'it's good that it makes you happy', shake their heads and smile politely.

One of these days I plan on going to one of the NYC montly meetups as those are within my means, but I will be bringing a friend (who is a figure collector so at least she's interested) for support.

I don't have high hopes, though.

For now I just sort of make do with reading on the forums and watching BJD prompt videos on youtube.

Sent from my SCH-I535 using Tapatalk

 

I don't have any doll friends and don't want any. I think if I was friends with another BJD collector in person, she (or he) would tell me about new releases and I'd end up buying more. I have no space left for dolls. I have 10 SDs just stuck in a closet because I got a cat, and there's no room in the house for another cabinet. I think a BJD friend would have been nice when I was new to the hobby and loved chatting about new and upcoming releases, but now it would seem kind of pointless.

 

Perhaps a little bit. I don't know anyone in real life who are into a similar hobby and I'm hesitant to let people know about this one especially considering the cost of the dolls. I think I've always had odd hobbies that none of my friends had so I'm use to it. I've considered going to a meet but when I think about it, I don't think I'll get much out of it personally. For customization help, I'm ok with using online resources and I'm willing to take the risk in doing customizations myself instead of finding someone to do it for me. It might be nice to meet a friend to talk about dolls with but I don't feel any need to go out and find one. I've also read a lot of stories of drama and stuff that can happen with meets and them not being too welcoming to newcomers. Now I wouldn't say I'm old, but I'm too old for that kind of thing.

I guess overall it'd be nice to have someone in person to share the hobby with but honestly, I'm ok without it. This might be because my roommate is willing to listen to me ramble about my projects and new dolls and stuff though

 

I actually find forums harder than in person meetings, since at least in person you can kind of just all chill in a room together doing your thing, even if you don't have much to say (which can be just fine!)... Whereas online, basically if you don't speak, you don't exist xD and I am a lurker by nature (see my epic post count), so yeah. I have no online dolly friends really. :c

I am the worst at being social... But look haha I am posting! I'm still trying! x'D

 

I did for ages, as I have no doll friends, but then I started opening up to the people around me who are super supportive. My boyfriend and my best male friend and I have a group chat on facebook, and I post stuff about my doll in there. They don't share the hobby but they have unusual hobbies (my boyfriend updates credits on obscure movies on imdb) so we support each other in that way.

Honestly, I feel more alone online. I haven't made any friends on DoA. I'd like to make friends on tumblr and through blogs, but I don't post enough on tumblr and find it really hard to find bjd blogs. I'm not really active enough online yet to "attract" other people.

 

I do. A lot most of the time actually. I don't make friends easily and I am a bit of a recluse. I am lucky that my sister loves and has BJD as well and that one of my best friends loves and has a few BJD as well. I don't get to see him too often sense he lives hours away. I have met two people who have BJD of their own in person. The first girl I met was wonderful! She mods broken dolls and makes them into beautiful art. I met her a few years ago when I got my first doll so I didn't have much to ask her sense I didn't know what to ask. I remember being so honored that she would let me move around her dolls hands and position him in different poses. The only thing is, I was kinda scared too so I only moved his hands a little lol. I never saw her again after that sadly. The second person I saw at a convention last year and I kinda knew her from the forms here. It seemed like I was not that welcome and that I was taking up her time by talking to her. Everyone is different and not every person is going to be like the first wonderful lady I met. Hopefully I can make new doll friends at that same convention this year when my group presents our panel this year.
If there were a few nice BJD people that lived around my town or in a neighboring one close by, then maybe it wouldn't feel so lonely.

 

Sometimes I feel lonely to be honest. Mainly when I was really excited about ordering my Doll and no one really was there to share with me my feelings. My husband support me in this hobby and I am very glad about it but it is not easy to find friends in forum, but at least I always try. In RL I am very shy, so it is a bit of a problem to talk to people. I have also one internet friend who would maybe share the hobby with me but the dolls are very expensive for her and she don't get the support of her husband and family just like I do. :/

 

Sometimes, yes. I don't know anyone locally who's into dolls, though I will admit to being a total loner. Generally speaking, socializing (especially in a group situation) just makes me uncomfortable. I wouldn't really call myself shy, I'm just entirely picky about how I spend my time and who I spend it with.

As for the forum, well.. I'm not exactly active here. There are so many people, it's too easy to just get lost in the shuffle.

 

This, too, but, it's fine, not having rl doll people, and I am connecting to a few particular folks here of late, which has been nice.

 

There are doll meets sometimes around where I live, but i dont think anyone lives close by, we meet sort of in the middle of where we live (DC)

If I may ask, where in Alabama? My family lives there and I visit them every other month or so. and thats awesome! I havent brought my boy anywhere besides the one meet i went to.

 

I don't feel lonely in the hobby at all. I was very (upsurdly) lucky to happen upon several collectors at the first anime convention I brought my dolls to. I connected with a few of them, met a few more at other meets and now those people that used to be 'doll friends' have become real life friends that I don't know what I do without! Several of them lives a few hours away but we connect through facebook, text or general chatting. I don't go to a lot of bigger meets anymore because when my littlr group gets together... we realise we aren't such a little group! :P

I'd encourage anyone who wants to meet people to go to meets, all kinds of meets. If you don't find people you enjoy at this one, go to that one! If meeting people is your thing, of course. I am so glad that I ventured out years ago to meet some of the amazing people I have!

 

That is good news, garrenn! I tell everyone who asks that I collect BJDs in the hopes that I can find fellow doll people in person. I've had friends who didn't like them and friends who were nice enough to ask more, but no fellow collectors in person. I doubt I'll find any on this island, but I move every few years so I'll try again then. I met a few collectors at panels at DragonCon in Atlanta last year, but I didn't get to talk to them, damn my awkwardness and tight schedule. I'm rubbish at making friends via forums too, so this forum hasn't netted me anyone either.

 

Thumbs up.

 

Yes, I was online harassed by one of the members of my local community for most of this year and basically made my life a living hell. My sister finally had to result to threatening them with legal action. (It's a felony in my state). This person is pretty influential in the local scene so I'm no longer comfortable going to local events for fear that they would be there and retaliate. (I'm scared they would break my dolls out of spite) Luckily my family has my back. I think they got banned here so I feel pretty safe on DOA. It's the one place I can do my doll thing without feeling nervous. I joined this hobby partially to make friends in my area but I don't think that's going to happen now.

 

Yes, unfortunately, I know the feeling. I got one of my friends into it, and she still thinks that BJDs are neat to look at, but the doll she bought has been in her box, untouched, in a cabinet, for over a year.

 

I do. I'm young, which is an immediate put-off for some people (and I don't blame them one bit!), and I'm relatively new. I've only had my first doll a little over a year, and I don't post very often. I was just getting to a rhythm in the hobby between making clothes and taking pictures when family tragedy hit and I lost most of my will to work with them for a little over three months. I'm not popular and don't get asked questions.

That said, I'm always open to making friends and chatting! I guess I just need a little more time and a lot more effort to feel like part of the community.

 

I'm a lonely person in general lol - I live in the middle Wisconsin and have zero interest in hunting, fishing, and spending my nights in bars, which is basically what everyone does here for "hobbies". There are meetups in my state, but over an hour away and from the interaction I've had with some of the people I'm not sure I would enjoy a meetup. There isn't really much appreciation for artistic/creative stuff here either, so the likelihood of meeting people who would have an interest in this hobby is pretty nil.

My girlfriend is kind of supportive. She has a handful of dolls that are just shelf babies anymore and will listen to most of my doll prattling - lol she will eventually get annoyed and get hostile about me planning another one or something.

I also rarely post online - I don't feel like I have anything worth adding or dolls that most people would be interested in seeing, so I don't make alot of friends that way either lol. I wish I could be more gregarious or open to new people!

 

Well, I'm not necessarily alone. But the vast majority of people don't understand why they are so expensive, and that's kind of annoying.
Especially those who can't tell the difference between a BJD and a Barbie, they make me very angry.

 

Sometimes yes, I feel lonely, especially "in" the forum. Because it's so hard to talk to other people when all you know about them is their dolls/doll stories, I suppose. Thankfully I've made a few really good dolly friends through tumblr and I was blessed enough to manage to pull my best friend in the hobby so I'm never alone in real life. There's also a few doll owners I managed to meet IRL as well, so it's all great! (: